Page 146 of Kingmakers, Year Four

“I’m at peace because we have my father back,” I say. “But I’mhappybecause of her.”

Hedeon follows my gaze away from my parents towards Nix, who’s crowded on the empty bed next to Leo’s with Anna and Sabrina on either side of her, smiling faintly for the first time in several days.

Hedeon’s eyes linger on Anna’s face. I’m sure he’s thinking of features very like hers, only a little different in color . . .

“I’m going back to Kingmakers,” he says. “Might as well finish. Only a few months left.”

“I think that’s the right choice,” I say, trying not to smile.

Once everyone is done eating,I ask Nix, “Do you want to come for a walk with me?”.

“Yes,” she says. “Only it looks freezing out there . . .”

“It is,” I assure her. “But I got you this.”

I hand her the coat I bought in the Zeliony Bazaar that morning. It’s a deep rust color, covered in black and cream embroidery, with soft strips of sable around the hem, cuffs, and hood.

When Nix pulls up the hood, covering her brilliant hair, she could almost be Kazakh herself. She has the narrow eyes and high cheekbones you often see in Eastern Europeans, especially those with Mongolian or Tartar ancestry.

“You look beautiful,” I tell her. “Like a fox.”

That’s what my father always calls my mother—moya malen’kaya lisa. My little fox.

The gold family ring glints on Nix’s finger. It gives me a possessive rush, reminding me that she belongs to me now. I want to get her another ring, a necklace, earrings, bracelets . . . I want her draped in golden chains, naked otherwise, tied up on my bed . . .

As we step out onto the street, Nix takes a deep breath of the frigid air, her face relaxing, her exhale streaming out of her lungs in silvery plumes.

“I don’t like hospitals,” she says.

“Neither do I. Even when we’ve taken over the whole wing.”

“When do we leave?” she asks me.

“I think tomorrow.”

She sighs, creating another frosty cloud that swirls around her face.

“How are you doing?” I ask her.

“I don’t know,” she says. “Maybe a little better.”

Nix and I have been going for walks every day for hours at a time. We have to, because I have so much to tell her. We have to re-do every conversation we ever had, when she asked me about my childhood and family and my life before Kingmakers. I’m giving her all my answers again, fully and truthfully this time.

Nix is getting to know me at the same time as I’m finally understanding myself.

I always wondered if I had it in me to live up to my parents.

I wondered if I could be a man like my father.

When the moment came, when I faced Marko Moroz on my own, I knew exactly what to do.

Because Iamlike my father. I always was.

Just like my father, all I needed to become the man I wanted to be . . . was the right woman.

I would do anything for Nix.

I CAN do anything for her.