It was the best option, even if it hurt her the most.
They didn't need to be involved with her.
Maybe she should run away and hide somewhere so she could be by herself. It isn't what she wanted, but she didn't deserve happiness, not when she had killed someone. Not when she felt so much guilt inside of her for killing him.
He was a bad guy, but the guilt was eating her inside. She took a human life, something she said she was never going to do.
"I don't think that should stop you from coming to the club," Monroe said. "I think you would enjoy coming with me and playing with some of the other Littles."
"I'm not a Little," Hedda said and didn't look up.
She hated when people just assumed that she was a Little. She wasn't.
"Sorry, Middle," Monroe said. "I didn't mean any offense. I just think you would get along with some of the other girls and guys there. They are all super sweet and they would love to meet you."
Hedda shook her head.
"You're allowed to come out of this house, you know that right?" Monroe asked.
But she didn't respond. She knew she was able to come out of the house but that didn't mean she wanted to. They could be out there. Both the bad guys and the twins.
She didn't want to face either one of them.
"Why don't you come with us tonight. If the twins are there, I can keep them away from you," Monroe said.
"Fuck off," Hedda said and turned her back towards her.
She felt bad for telling Monroe to fuck off because she had been nothing but kind to her. At the same time, shehadtold Monroe she didn't want to go out.
"O-okay," Monroe stuttered. "I'm sorry."
Guilt started to eat at Hedda, but she stopped herself from looking back at Monroe and apologizing. She heard Monroe walk out of her room, silently shutting the door behind her. That wasn't the first time Hedda had snapped at Monroe. She had been super nice to her, but she kept pushing Hedda to do things she had said no to.
Hedda closed her eyes and took a deep breath in. She was for sure going to get a little scolding from Michael when he found out that she said that to Monroe. He was super protective of Monroe.
Michael had tried to help Hedda several times, but she didn't want it. She didn't need it. He told her he could giveher medicine to help her sleep better at night, but she shot that down right away.
There was no way she was going to sleep and not be aware of her surroundings. That was suicide, especially when some people were after her.
He had told her he would keep her safe and that she had a guard who was patrolling, but she still didn't want to take the risk. She wasn't Michael's responsibility, and she didn't want to be. She was here visiting for a little while longer until she figured out how she was going to escape from everything.
Hedda had a couple yelling matches with Michael when he suggested she talk to someone about what happened. She had cursed at him, telling him to go to hell and to leave her alone about this subject. She thought for sure he was going to kick her out at that point, but he calmly said that he wouldn't bring it up again but that she shouldn't curse.
She had scoffed at that. Her not curse? That wasn't going to happen. It was who she was, and it was part of her.
Michael had brought up the twins and said they probably wouldn't like it. That made her shut down and leave the room. The twinsdidn'tlike it and had talked to her several times about getting her to stop, but she wasn't going to. They weren't her Daddies and she didn't have to follow their rules.
They had given her some when she said she wanted to be their Middle, but that all stopped when she shot Richard and stopped talking to them. They had no clue what happened, and she was going to keep it that way.
Leo
Come tonight. We would love to see you.
Tears filled her eyes, and she turned her phone off. Her heart broke at the text. She wanted to go but she couldn't see them, and she wasn't safe. They didn't deserve to have a girl who was broken, angry, and scared. It wasn't fair to them.
Hedda wrapped the blanket tighter around her and sat down on her bed, staring off into space.
CHAPTER TWO