Page 69 of Ruthless Riches
“I don’t know. I think I had two or three a couple of times a week after they arrived. I couldn’t exactly pig out on them every single day,” she said, folding her arms. “I would’ve gained too much weight.”
I rubbed my aching temples. “Edward said the drugs can cause psychosis.”
Sascha stiffened. “I’m not psychotic.”
“You are,” I said, staring up at her. “You need help.”
“God, you sound just like that fucking doctor,” she said hotly, rolling her eyes.
“What doctor?”
“One I saw a while ago. I only went in because my friends made me. They thought I was having some sort of breakdown over some piece I was working on. I guess I was a bit stressed, but that fucking doctor…” She paused and shook her head, eyes alight with anger. “He acted like I was insane. Said I was having a psychotic episode. Then he tried to tell me that I need to take meds for the rest of my life. All because I’m a little bit emotional.”
“You are emotional, but this is different, Sascha. It’s not just emotion,” I said, vehemently shaking my head. “This isn’t you. You’re someone else right now. You need serious help.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake. You’re just like everyone else!” she shouted, throwing her hands up. “Always telling me how fucking crazy I am.”
“I’ve never called you crazy.”
“You never needed to say it outright,” she said, nostrils flaring. “You’ve always mocked me for feeling everything. Acted like you’re so cool and logical because it’s so much easier for you to detach. How the fuck did you think I would take that after so many fucking years of it?”
“I’m sorry if I ever made you feel crazy,” I said softly. “I really didn’t mean to.”
Sascha’s expression turned distant. Then she sank to the floor again, burying her face in her hands.
I stared at her, wondering how I’d missed her turning into this unrecognizable monster. Wondering about all the signs I’d missed along the way.
I really should’ve picked up on the mood swings. She swung from hot to cold so rapidly that I should’ve known something was going on. But I was so obsessed with my own life and problems that it never occurred to me that something was happening to her. Never occurred to me that she was rapidly sinking into a state of psychosis.
Her fixation on getting our family back together was probably the second sign I should’ve noticed. At the time, I assumed it was normal, because she’d always said she wanted a bigger family. I didn’t know the need to belong to something bigger was pathological, though, and I didn’t know it would lead her down such a dark, twisted path.
Then again, if she hadn’t been constantly drugged by Edward’s ‘gift’ over the last few months, she wouldn’thave gone down that path in the first place.
“What are you going to do now, Sascha?” I asked tentatively. “Are you really going to keep me locked away forever?”
“Yes. I have to,” she muttered, looking up at me. Her eyes looked glazed now. “I can’t let you go.”
“Are you going to keep hurting people?”
She nodded. “I have to.”
“You don’t. We can get you help.”
“I don’t want help!” she shouted. “I told you, I like it! I loveit!”
“The real Sascha doesn’t love it,” I said softly, reaching through the bars to lay a hand on her arm. “As soon as you come down from this state, you’ll regret everything. You won’t be able to take any of it back, but you can stop yourself from making it any worse.”
She shook my hand off and rose to her feet again. “You just don’t get it,” she said stiffly. “I knew you wouldn’t.”
I nodded. “You’re right. I don’t get it,” I said. “But I still want answers.”
“I gave you answers.”
“Not to everything,” I said. “Why did you come down here and pretend to be a prisoner yesterday? Was it just to fuck with my head?”
A small smile tugged at her lips. “You really don’t know?”
“No.”
