Page 40 of Sinful Palace

10

Logan

Last night was bad.

Really fucking bad.

Holding my head in my hands, I leaned forward and blew out a frustrated breath. There was so much shit I couldn’t get out of my mind. Willow. Her brother. Chloe. Teddy.

Christ, Teddy… I shot him in cold blood, for fuck’s sake.

I kept waiting for the remorse to hit me, but deep down, I knew it wasn’t coming. I felt nothing about his death beyond acceptance, as if I knew for sure I did the right thing, even though he was my friend for over a decade before I made the split-second decision to put that bullet in his head.

It was wrong. I should care more. I should feel guilty. I should feel utterly horrified. But I couldn’t, no matter how much I tried to force it. Something about Willow was holding me back; switching my focus.

For the last week and a half, I’d tried to convince myself that it wasn’t happening. That I didn’t have any feelings for her. That I only saved her from Teddy because I owned her.

It was all bullshit, obviously. I knew it the whole time. I just didn’t want to admit it. Not to myself, and certainly not to her.

Now she’d gone and figured it out anyway.

I saw the realization flashing in her eyes last night, followed by that smug fucking gleam as she finally grasped the kind of power she had over me. I couldn’t stand it. Couldn’t stand her realizing that I actually cared for her despite all the shit she’d done. Couldn’t stand her knowing that every time I saw her and touched her, I felt some sort of spark. Some glimmer of hope and warmth, shining through the usual cold fury.

I wanted to keep hating her, but I couldn’t.

I hated myself instead, for betraying my sister. What kind of fucking asshole did something so heinous to his own family? Willow literally tried to kill Chloe, left her for dead in the rain five years ago, and here I was, protecting her anyway. Wanting her. Craving her. Needing her.

It drove me insane, filling me with white-hot rage that burned through my veins like wildfire.

When Willow figured out the truth and called me out on it, the fire burned higher and higher, bringing the hot mess of emotions inside me to a boiling point. I kept telling her to drop it, afraid of what I might do if she pushed me too far, but she was too fucking stubborn to listen. She just kept pushing and pushing and pushing until….

“Fuck!”

I lifted my head and rubbed my eyes to clear the haze in front of them. Then I pushed off the bed and stepped out into the hallway, unable to sit still a moment longer. I hadn’t slept a wink, but it didn’t matter. My brain kept playing last night’s events in my head on a loop, filling me with chaotic energy despite the exhaustion seeping through my limbs.

When I turned the corner, I almost bumped right into my mother. She was wearing a black coat over matching black pants, and a thick red woolen scarf was wrapped around her neck, covering every inch of skin beneath her chin.

“Oops!” She stepped backward, letting out a nervous laugh. “Nearly had a collision there!”

“Sorry. I wasn’t paying attention.”

Mom waved a hand. “Not your fault, darling. I was looking at my phone.”

“Right.” I gestured to her neck. “Aren’t you overheating in that thing? It’s huge.”

She shook her head and lifted her fingers to tighten the scarf around her throat. “No, I’m fine. I just went for a walk, and it’s absolutely freezing outside. I think it might finally start snowing soon.”

“Yeah, maybe.”

“What are you doing up so early, anyway?” she asked, tilting her head to one side. “You usually sleep in on Sundays.”

“Not this time. I couldn’t sleep at all last night,” I replied.

“Oh, that’s a shame.” She frowned. “Wait, why were you coming from that hall?” she asked, motioning to the right. “Your room is on the other end of the floor.”

“I stayed somewhere else last night.”

Her frown deepened. “Why?”

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