I held both palms up now. “Not unless you ask. In fact, I will not touch you in any way unless you ask for it. Okay?”
I expected her shoulders to lift a little at that, but they didn’t, and her face went blank again. She didn’t believe me. “Yes, sir.”
“You don’t have to call me that unless you want to. No more of the old rules, Celeste. You can do whatever you like, say whatever you like. Within reason.”
“Okay.” Still nothing, not even another flicker of surprise. She was like a zombie.
“Anything you want, just ask for it. I’ll do my best.” I felt like a fucking teenager begging his girlfriend not to dump him, and I knew I was going soft over her. But I couldn’t stop myself. I needed her eyes to light up again, needed to see nothing but pure adoration in her gaze. I needed her to want to be mine again.
She looked at me, her face still expressionless. “I want freedom.”
I sighed. “Anything but that. I can’t let you go. You know that.”
“There isn’t anything else I want,” she said, pushing her bowl away, leaving the majority of her dinner untouched.
I leaned forward. “There must be something I can do to make you happier.” My face brightened. “Oh, your herbs have recovered. I checked them all earlier. That’s actually what I used for the garnish on the risotto; some of the parsley. You could start going out to the greenhouse every day again. Would you like that?”
She shrugged and didn’t reply.
I tried another tack. “What about that cat shelter you used to donate to? Tomorrow I could go and write them a check for a hundred grand. That’d help a lot of your little feline friends, wouldn’t it? Maybe one day when things have settled, we could even adopt a kitten for you.”
She frowned, as if she couldn’t believe I was actually trying to bribe her into falling for me. “Actually, there is something else I want,” she said quietly. “Honesty. Be honest with me, Alex.”
I held up my hands. “I’m always honest with you. I know you don’t believe me, but I’ve never lied to you.”
There was a tiny spark of something in her eyes, but they went flat again before I could tell what it was. “Can I go back to my room now?” she asked.
I was struck by a sudden feeling that I’d once again done something terribly wrong, but I had no idea what. I nodded at her, guilt stabbing at my guts. “Of course. I’ll put your dinner in the fridge in case you want it later.”
I knew she wouldn’t eat it. She would let it go to waste, just like her breakfast, slowly making herself fade away. I didn’t want to force feed her, but if it came down to it, I might have to. I hoped it would never come to that, though. I hoped I could find a way to help her feel something again, because I had to fix her before she was broken beyond repair.
Before it was too late….