Page 25 of The Final Rose

He’snotperfect.

He’snota character.

He’s a three-dimensional being, full of life.

He’s actually a pain in my ass

I shouldn’t have, but I’m on my fourth cup of coffee. It’s also after 10 pm.

Our crew meeting is full, and since I hate this kind of affair, I concentrate on the whiteboard in front of me rather than on the rest of the people. Our schedule is laid from now until the end of the season. Every episode counted for, every twist and turn planned.

I used to love the feeling of reality TV twisting the old plain reality. I liked the thrill of planning what couldn’t be planned, the race when things turned bad without a warning.

I’m disconnected this season though, and I feel it all over my skin. The weird feeling churning in my belly is one I can’t understand.

I love my job. I’m good at it. I like the crew, and I believe in the show. I count all the ways why I should be comfortable, but still, something turns me inside out.

I’m forced to stop addressing my nerves. I’m in a room full of people, and things turn up a notch when Adam arrives and goes straight to the board. With no ceremony, he wipes all our schedules dramatically. I don’t gasp, it’s not like we don’t have it penciled in our journals, laptops, emails, and everywhere else.

He grabs the black marker and writes right in the middle of the whiteboard:

Vera

Kirsten

Maya

Mackenzie

He drops the marker as he swirls around to face us.

“Who else?”

Someone from Nessa’s team clears her throat, “I’d say Abby instead of Kirsten. She’s lively and did well on the group date.”

“We need six names to bring to London. Why not just add her?”

“Abby and Kirsten are equivalents.” Someone waves me off.

I frown, but I say nothing. In real life, no two people aren’t interchangeable. But on TV?

Abby and Kirsten are sweet brunettes who work with children. If this was a fiction series, their stories would be mashed into one character.

“Let’s wait for the screening test,” Anya speaks up. “And go with the one who tests better.”

Adam agrees, and besides Kirsten’s name, he adds a slash to add Abby’s.

“How about the southern belle?” Devi asks.

“Oh!” Nessa taps her pen happily on the table. “She has never left the country!”

“That’s a great segment.” And Grace is added to the list.

“One more name, people.”

If I was dumber, I’d point out that Sebastian is the one choosing who he’s bringing to London.

We traditionally bring the top six and the Eligible for a romantic trip in the Canary Islands for the second leg of the show, but since Sebastian was from London, the opportunity was too good to miss.

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