Page 55 of Bring me Back

The irony.My eyes flickered to the town spreading underneath us. I would never escape Bluehaven. It followed me in my memories, every Christmas and every time I had to walk down Main Street. I didn’t get stronger as I left, I just became haunted.

“I thought I could handle it.” I turned away from Bluehaven to the warm eyes of the only person I trusted besides Dad, Marian and Torres.

Daniel wasn’t just my only friend. He was the first one to know the new version of me. The scared, trembling Hallie who ran away in fear was long gone. I was quiet and shy now, but it took years for me not to be afraid.

“You don’t need to share if you don’t want,” he said in the gentlest voice.

If I wasn’t going to talk to him, then who? I shook my head, determined. “One day after a class, I waited until the changing room was empty so I could have a shower in peace. And I did.” I gulped. A prickling sensation went down my spine, it brought me right back to that day. That stupid day when I let my guard down. I always just threw a t-shirt on and left with my bathing suit still wet underneath. But that day I thought I was being silly, that day I believed I was being overcautious. “They caught me after my shower.”

“They?” I heard the edge in his voice.

“She got everyone together, and they waited for me.” I drew a calming breath. “I’m going to say it all at once and matter-of-factly because I think that’s the only way I can talk about it. Is that ok?”

“Of course.” He rasped.

“They took my towel. They made fun of me like they always did. But it was so much worse, because I was naked and…” I stopped again, breathing in and out. “She had a Polaroid. It took me long to realize I was trying to hide and there were at least ten of them. And a couple of guys.”

Daniel froze beside me. I kept going or I would’ve stopped completely.

“They took the Polaroid pictures and passed them along. They wrote what I needed to change, and…”

They laughed and joked, then they left for college and moved on with their lives. I was the one who carried the scars. I remembered everything that was said about my body. I heard it every time I was standing alone in front of a mirror. I knew how stupid, cruel they all were. I refused to be guided by their mistake. But I couldn’t forget. It ran through my mind more times than I should’ve let it. Dad wanted the reason I came back to Bluehaven?

It wasn’t because of the expensive rent back in the city.

It wasn’t because I had no friends and was alone beside by Ms. Handall.

It was because their voices still followed me and I needed them to stop. I came back to the Hellmouth because hiding wasn’t an option.

“Hallie…” his tone was so different from the one I grew used to. “What happened with the pictures?”

“They had it. When I got my clothes back, I just wanted to leave. I didn’t think…”

“I know,” he agreed. But I still felt stupid for not staying and demanding the pictures.

“What happened?”

“I don’t know.” I shook my head. “But I was called to the principal’s office a week after and he insinuated he had them.”

Daniel growled. I ignored it. “He asked if I was giving them to…” I sighed. “If I was sharing them with the boys.”

“He asked what?!” And this time he let it go. The cart swung with the force of his reaction, and I placed my hand on top of his leg.

“I’m done with it.”

“I’m starting!”

“Dan…” I shook my head.

“Hallie…” my name on his lips was a plea.

“Do you want me to keep talking?”

He nodded stiffly.

“I just wanted to go. They always told me how much better things would be once I got into college…”

“Who are they?”