Page 120 of Breakneck Hockey

“Tell me more.”

“I told him if he ever does shit like he did that night, I’d fuck him up.”

That’s more like it. That’s what I needed. I just wanted to know that he had my back.

“I coulda said what I said nicer. I don’t think you would have taken it much better but, yeah, I can see how my words would sting right after you brought me into your world. I was a dick, too. Forgive me?”

“Nothing to forgive, Alderchuck. I didn’t like it, sure, but I’m glad you said it. We good for real now?”

“Yeah, we’re good. But Lane and I aren’t.”

“I warned him. That’s his problem now. I’ll be at my parents’ for Christmas Eve dinner.”

Christmas break is weeks away. “Good for you. Good night. I’m hanging up now.”

“You’re coming to my parents’ house for Christmas, kitten. Deal with it,” he says and then hangs up on me.

His demanding voice makes me all fuzzy on the inside. I don’t get him. I don’t get myself when I’m with him.

I flop on my bed, staring at my phone, willing it to give me the answers to a Sutter puzzle that’s missing too many pieces.

“We’re still just going for dinner at your parents’ house, yeah?” It took a lot of convincing on his part. We haven’t dated. The closest thing to a relationship we do is fightlike an old married couple. And then he asks, no, demands that I join him for Christmas Eve dinner with his mom, stepdad, and little sister?

Makes sense.

“Just the dinner, and sex at my house later.”

“There better be sex. It’s been almost a month, Sutter. Your balls better be just as blue.”

“They’re blue, Alderchuck. Enough talk about my nuts. Get in the fucking car and do your seatbelt up.”

After that whole situation with Henry, I stopped hooking up. It shouldn’t feel wrong to hook up, but it does. I didn’t talk to Sutter about it—no way am I touching the relationship topic with him after the last time—it was a decision I made based on my own virtues. But no way is Sutter as virtuous as I am.

I’m in the car with my seatbelt on, waiting for him to drive. He hasn’t started the car yet.

“Um, you okay, man?” I ask. Sutter’s acting strange, even for him. His hands are on the wheel, but he hasn’t even reached for the button yet. This car has one of those keyless ignition deals.

Finally, a hand runs through his hair, hair he didn’t wrap in a bandana for once. It’s free-flowing, falling over his eyes. He turns to me.

“I was thinkin’. Maybe we don’t hook up with anyone but each other, just until we’re finished with whatever this is.”

“No one can ever say you’re not romantic, Romeo,” I say with all the sarcasm in the world.

“Alderchuck,” he warns.

“Yeah, I’m down. Haven’t touched anyone else since you the last time we hooked up.”

“Good boy, Alderchuck.”

I roll my eyes. “Don’t act like you haven’t been sabotaging my hookups, and warning every man in the NHL that touching me results in harm.”

A slow smile spreads across his lips, so damn proud of himself. “Same, I haven’t hooked up since us either. Here.” He takes a condom from his inner jacket pocket.

It’s already been opened. There’s nothing inside it. I raise my brows. We’ve done a lot, like, a lot, but I can’t begin to think what this might mean.

“Okay, so this idea was a lot cooler in my head,” he says. “I stopped hooking up, too. I’m tested and in the clear. I was thinkin’ that if you agreed to this and if you got tested too?—”

“I’m tested. I’m good, too.” It’s something I have done every so often. Upon my decision to stop hooking up seemed as good a time as any.

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