Page 64 of From Wink to Kink

As we head back to our bungalow, I steel myself for the conversation ahead. It's time to be honest—with Chuck, and with myself. It's terrifying, but as I feel Chuck's steady presence beside me, I realize something.

I'm ready to take the risk.

31

RUBY

So much for risk-taking.Truth be told, I am a big old chicken shit.

I don’t know if that’s because I just plain don’t know what to say, or reallydoknow what to say, and am just toochicken-shitto say it.

"Come on, Brooks. It'll be fun," Chuck says, his eyes twinkling with that mischievous gleam I'm starting to find irresistible. "When's the last time you went stargazing?"

I try to maintain my skeptical expression, but I can feel my resolve crumbling. "I don't know, Chuck. What about the nighttime bugs? You know I’m not a big fan."

His laugh is warm and rich, one I can’t resist. "I promise to protect you from any marauding insects. Bird-eating spiders, too. Scout's honor," he says.

Blech.

"You were a scout?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.

"No, but I feel like I've earned some wilderness cred after surviving this resort."

"Good one. Fine. Let's go stargaze."

His face lights up as if I’ve agreed to something far more exciting than lying on the ground looking at the sky. But he takes my hand, and as we follow the group to an observation deck, I find myself caught up in his excitement.

When we find a quiet spot away from most of the others, he spreads out a blanket he somehow procured, which I know better than to ask about. We lie down side by side, our shoulders just touching, and I’m sure to keep my hands free to swat away any blood-hungry insects.

For a moment, we're quiet, taking in the vast expanse of stars. It really is breathtaking and I’m glad he talked me into participating. Living in the city, I'd forgotten how many stars there are.

"Damn," I breathe.

"Yeah," Chuck agrees. Then, "Hey, I think I see the Big Dipper!"

I squint in the direction he's pointing. "Sorry, but that's Orion's Belt."

In the moonlight, I can see him turn to me. "Nerd."

"Jock," I tease.

We fall into an easy conversation, pointing out constellations—well, I point them out and Chuck makes up increasingly ridiculous names for them—sharing stories from our childhoods, discussing our hopes and fears. It's the kind of talk that feels both exhilarating and scary in its normalcy and intimacy.

"You know," Chuck says during a lull in the conversation, "I've never done this before."

"Stargaze?" I ask. “Yeah, me neither.”

"No, I mean...this. Talking. Really talking, you know? With someone I'm... interested in."

My heart does a little flip. "Oh," I say. "Huh.”

"Ruby, I... I really like you. And I know this trip has been kind of whack, but I can't help feeling like maybe it's not such a bad thing that we ended up here."

"I like you too, Chuck," I gulp. "More than I expected to."

"Well, in that case..." He reaches for something and returns with a small lunch bag. "I got ya a surprise."

I sit up, frowning. "What's this?"

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