Page 89 of From Wink to Kink

"You're one of the most incredible women I've ever met. You're smart, funny, and way tougher than you give yourself credit for. So why are you letting fear hold you back now?"

Her words catch me off guard. "I... it's not fear. It's just... being realistic."

Lucy shakes her head. "No, it's fear. Fear of getting hurt, fear of stepping out of your comfort zone. And you know what? That's okay. Fear is normal. But the Ruby I've gotten to know doesn't let fear stop her."

I'm quiet for a moment, absorbing her words. Then I say, "But what about the publicity? The constant scrutiny? I've seen what Tyler lives with."

"So you learn to deal with it," she shrugs. "You set boundaries, you find ways to maintain your privacy. It's not easy, but if it's worth it, you make it work."

"And you think... you think it could be worth it?" I ask, a hint of hope creeping into my voice despite my best efforts to squash it.

Lucy smiles, squeezing my hand. "I think that's something only you can decide. But from what you've told me, and from what I've seen? Yeah, I think it could be."

I nod, a small smile tugging at my lips. It's the first time I've felt even close to smiling all day.

"Now," Lucy says, standing up and pulling me with her, "let's find you a bridesmaid dress that doesn't make you look like you're being eaten by a pastel monster."

I laugh, the sound surprising me with its genuineness. "Okay, but please, no more puffy sleeves. I have my limits."

As we dive back into the racks of dresses, I feel a weight lift from my shoulders. I'm not sure what I'm going to do about Chuck, but for the first time since Costa Rica, I feel like maybe there's hope.

And if nothing else, at least I have an ally in my quest to avoid fashion disasters. Because let's face it, navigating love and bridesmaid dresses requires all the help you can get.

46

RUBY

After the bridesmaid dress outing,Tyler treats Lucy and me to dinner at our favorite Italian place. As we settle into our booth, I can't help but notice the way my brother looks at his fiancé, like she's the sun and he's discovering light for the first time.

It's sweet. It's adorable. It's making me want to projectile vomit across the table.

"So, Rubes," Tyler says as we peruse the menus, "how was the retreat? You haven't really talked about it."

I nearly choke on my water. "Oh, you know," I manage, "it was... relaxing."

Lucy catches my eye, raising an eyebrow. I silently plead with her not to say anything.

"Relaxing, huh?" Tyler prods. "Must have been some retreat. I saw those photos online. Looked like you and Chuck were getting pretty cozy."

Dammit.

My face heats. "It wasn't... we were just..."

"Hanging out?" Tyler finishes, his tone skeptical. "Come on, sis. I know Chuck. He doesn't just 'hang out' with women."

"Tyler," Lucy warns, placing a hand on his arm.

But now that he's started, he’s on a roll. "Don't get me wrong, Rubes, Chuck's a great guy. But he's not exactly the relationship type, you know? And you're my sister. I just want to make sure you're not getting in over your head."

Something in me snaps. Maybe it's the stress of the day, or the pent-up emotions from the past few weeks. Or maybe it's just that I'm tired of pretending.

"You want to know what happened?" I blurt out. "Fine. I'll tell you exactly what happened."

And so, right there in the middle of Mama Gina's Trattoria, surrounded by checkered tablecloths and the smell of garlic bread, I spill the whole sordid tale.

"It wasn't a yoga retreat," I start, my words coming out in a rush. "It was a couples retreat. A sexy couples retreat."

Tyler's eyes widen and Lucy looks like she's trying not to laugh.

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