Page 70 of Stealing Home

I can’t help but laugh with him. He’s right, I’m sure I will get mad at him, but I don’t think I’ll remember those words when it happens.

Holy shit, that was a lot, but not at the same time. What a bitch. It’s not like she didn’t know what was coming with his season starting. Note to self: if this goes any further, always remember you know what you are getting into with his schedule.

“Do you want to tell me about Toby in full, or do you want to watch the movie I picked out?” He asks me, letting me decide what happens next.

He was so honest and forthcoming that I want to give him that back.

“Small dick Toby first, movie and cuddles after.” I tell him.

“Sounds good to me.” he says nodding.

“After I ended things with Toby and looked back at our relationship, I saw all the signs I ignored. The first six months of us dating were probably the best, and they weren’t even that great. He put effort in to get me but after a few months of us being official, things changed. We would do date nights and sleepovers don’t get me wrong, but Toby wouldn’t always call me back or answer my texts. When I would call him out on it, he would blame work.

“He would also consistently say I was needy. But then he would dote on me to make me happy for a while. It was a never-ending cycle. Dani pointed it out a few times, but I would always say that his job was the reason. During our relationship, he received two promotions in his company. He became a project leader and then towards the end of our relationship, a project manager. I knew he had aspirations to grow within the company and I fully supported that. He supported me, wanting to get out of being just some glorified receptionist.” I tell him.

“Well, at least he did that right.” Cole notes.

“I guess. The last few months before I caught him cheating, I could feel some sort of disconnect, but I didn’t want to acknowledge it. I stayed with him, even though I wasn’t exactly happy. For a while, I tried to make it work. He didn’t put the same effort in. We would spend most of our time together inside his place. I would try to get him out, but he would just complain he was too tired from work.” I say.

“That doesn’t seem fair.”

“It wasn’t. But I loved him, or so I thought. Which meant I wanted to give him what he needed. I don’t even know what made me want to work on the relationship.”

“You don’t beat yourself A. We’re human and are emotional creatures.” Cole tries to console me.

“But, I know now. I know I was lonely and felt like there wasn’t anyone in the world that loved me anymore. And that’s a tough pill to swallow because I should have been stronger than that. When I met Toby, I was still grieving the losses of both my parents. I needed someone to care about me because I wasn’t sure I even cared about myself. But just like we talked about our parents earlier, I knew what Toby and I had deep down wasn’t even close to what they had.

“I truly felt my mom having heart issues was because of the loss of my dad. They didn’t start until after he passed away. Shedied of a broken heart and because the other half of her soul wasn’t here on this earth with her. That’s the type of love I want and deserve and I’m obviously still living, so that means that Toby wasn’t the one.” I finish with tears in my eyes yet again tonight.

Fuck.

I bury my face in Cole’s neck, and he instantly rubs my back while kissing the top of my head.

“I’m glad you’re still on this earth and he wasn’t the one. We wouldn’t be here if he was,” Cole whispers to me.

Now the tears fall. He knows when my tears hit his skin because he wraps his other arm around me and just hugs me. This man must be a damn bulldozer because he breaking all these walls I thought I had built with steel. Instead, it seems like I built it with bricks and he is knocking the wall away brick by brick.

“A, you have people who care and love you. Dani, Heather, Ty, the team. I care about you a lot more than I should probably admit. You might not have had that when you needed it the most, but you will never not have that from now on.” He assures me.

I take my time gathering myself. I don’t know how much time passes before the tears stop. Cole doesn’t stop rubbing my back the entire time.

He has now let me cry twice, and it’s only our first date, but it doesn’t seem like it’s scaring him off. If anything, it feels like I’ve been able to let go of a lot of hurt and it’s only allowing Cole to get in deeper. How in the hell did all of this happen? The last six years have changed so much of my life and who I am, but for the first time I’m not asking why but saying thank you because it’s led me here to this moment where I feel a piece of my heart healing.

Even if Cole and I don’t work out in the long term, this man has shown me that even after so much pain and grief that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel. You just don’t know how long the tunnel is and how long you will be in the dark.

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

Cole

“How are we doing?” I ask Adriana.

She’s been quiet, and her tears have stopped falling. I need to make sure she is okay.

“I’m okay, sorry.” She says.

“You have nothing to apologize for. We hit some heavy areas tonight. I don’t want you to think you can’t show or feel your emotions in front of me. You can tell me about anything. You can use my shoulder to lean or cry on. I got you.”

Adriana just shakes her head with a small smile. Even with tears, she is the most beautiful woman.