Page 96 of Claim Me

“What about Glen?”

“For now, we can keep him upstairs. When he hits his terrible teens, we’ll move him to the basement where he can jack off without interruption.”

“I never had my own floor to jack off,” Indigo says and peeks into the room. “I don’t want him to feel left out.”

“If he doesn’t want to move down there in a few years, we’ll turn the playroom into a bedroom for the new baby. Who knows? Maybe the twins will want to be down there.”

The basement isn’t creepy at all. The ceiling is high and covered in recessed lighting. I would have killed to have a hangout spot like this as a teenager.

“What do you think?” I ask Indigo when we return to the backyard.

“I want it.”

“I know.”

“Do you want it?”

“I love my house,” I mumble and then shrug. “But I’ve been preparing for this move for a while.”

Indigo seems unsure. Not about the new house. He loves the space and floorplan. Yet, he gets attached to places. He was sad when he left the hills for the farm. He missed the main farmhouse when he moved to the second one with his adult club brothers. He missed the farm when he came to my house. Now, he’s gotten attached to my house.

In the end, Indigo never needs to say goodbye to the ranch because his brother buys it. By then, Bobby has settled into his job at the club’s contracted law firm. Cathy’s a full-time substitute teacher at the kids’ school, having taken over a class while a teacher is on maternity leave. They’re talking about having a baby, and my house is in the right neighborhood.

Once the two-story home is ours, we throw a party. My entire family shows up. I try to organize the timing so Zoot and Caveman aren’t around at the same time. That doesn’t work, and the men poke at each other until I’m certain wrestling will break out.

“As you know,” I say, stepping between them, “I chose Lorcan’s name because of Zoot’s wonderful suggestion.”

Caveman sneers at me before turning his irritation at Zoot, who embraced my lie once he realized it irritated his rival.

“But for this baby, I want to honor my other uncle,” I say and then glance at Noble. “Sorry. But I’ll have to honor you with a plaque or a special event or something. Because I’m naming this baby after Caveman.”

“That’s dumb,” Zoot says and pets my head. “Your sister gave her kids great names from a cool movie. Instead, you name your kids shit that no one can spell. Now you’re naming the newest one after this fucking moron?”

Caveman spits out, “You’re the one that can’t fucking spell, so who’s the moron here?”

“Your love warms my heart,” I say and smile at them. “But Caveman did watch out for Indigo.”

“I did that, too,” Noble mutters, really selling his hurt feelings.

“Fine. We will name our son Oisin Nobility O’Malley.”

“That’s a terrible name,” Zoot grumbles.

“If you want a kid with a better name, go make one. This is my son’s name, and you’re making fun of him.”

With my third pregnancy, I gain the superpower to cry on demand. I use this talent to get out of a lot of work. Right now, I unleash it on Zoot.

He steps away, horrified by my emotions. “Name the kid Otis or whatever it is. Good luck. See you around.”

We enjoy a good chuckle as he walks away.

Wiping my eyes, I look at Caveman. “You’re welcome.”

My uncle shakes his head. “No one is ever saying that name right.”

“Then, my boy will get a nickname like you did,” I say and shrug. “Some people go out of their way to make life complicated.”

“Uh-huh. How come you’re using Noble’s road name, but you’ve decided to use my legal one?” Caveman demands, clearly still riled up from when he thought he might pound on Zoot.

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