Page 93 of Tight End

Everything goes black—my vision, my brain. I can’t think. I can’t move. I can’t fucking breathe. She’s still talking, but the only thing I hear is a faint buzzing. June. Hospital. Accident.

June. Hospital. Accident.

The buzzing gets louder. Louder. God, why won’t it stop. It’s in my bones. It’s deep inside me.

All I see is darkness. The walls are closing in.

June. Accident.

It’s like I’m reliving the worst day of my life. Everything is about to get ripped away from me. No, it can’t happen again. It can’t. I need June. I can’t live alone. I can’t do this. And Oliver. Oh God.

“Daddy?”

Oliver’s voice breaks through the fog surrounding me, and he shakes my arm. My fingers go numb and I force myself to loosen my grip on the phone. Her mom is still there, still talking, and I draw in a shaky breath.

“Ryan? Are you there? Can you hear me?” She’s talking fast. A horn honks.

I take in another breath. And then another. “Where is she?”

She lets out a relieved sigh. “She’s at Nashville General. I’ll meet you there. Poppy and I are on the way now.”

I don’t bother responding. I’m not sure I can. I’m up in a flash, phone in my pocket, and I’m turning off the TV and grabbing my keys.

“Sorry, Oli, we can finish the movie later. Right now we need to go.”

But he’s still on the couch, his head tilted as he stares at me. “Go where?”

“To see your grandmother and Aunt Poppy.”

“But we already saw fem today.”

“Dammit, Oliver,” I snap. I can’t play twenty questions. I can’t let more time pass. Not when June’s in the hospital. She could be unconscious. She could be so injured she may never recover. She could ... she could already be gone.

Tears fill his eyes and I curse. Shit. Motherfucker. I need to calm down. I need to get a fucking grip before I do something stupid and hurt us both.

I drop down to my knees in front of him and grab his hands, giving them a light squeeze. “I’m sorry I lost my temper and yelled at you, but we really have to go. Do you know what an emergency is?” He sniffles, nodding, and yeah, I feel like shit. “Right now Daddy has an emergency and we need to go. Do you think you can help me get down to the car?”

Another nod and thank God, he climbs down from the couch and grabs my hand.

Within minutes we’re down in the garage, and I get him all buckled in. Only once I’m in the driver’s seat, I realize how bad my hands are shaking, how badI’mshaking. Fuck.Fuck. I grab the steering wheel, digging my fingers into the leather and close my eyes. My heart is beating so hard, so fast. I need to get to June. I need to get to the hospital, but I won’t risk Oliver to do it. He’s depending on me. I may be all he has.

God—

Please let June be alive.

Please.

Oliver needs his mom and I just need her.

I buckle my seat belt and slowly open my eyes, glancing at Oliver in the back seat. He’s staring out the window, humming along to a song I didn’t even realize was playing on the radio. We’re going to be okay. She’s going to be okay. She has to be.

Please.

Once I’ve got myself under control, I shift the car to reverse, back out of my spot, and take off. Thank God, the lights are on my side, and traffic seems lighter than usual. It doesn’t take long for us to pull into ER parking.

“What is it?” Oliver asks, glancing around as I get him unbuckled and out of his seat.

“I ... your mom ...” He’s staring at me, his eyes so innocent. I don’t want to do this to him. I don’t want to break him. But more than anything I don’t have news to give him.

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