Page 19 of Hero

Zed breaks off his question at my gesture and shifts gears swiftly. “Oh, before I forget, I found a new rock for your collection.” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a rounded rock so shiny it looks polished.

“Ooh! Pretty!” Rina grabs for the rock, turning it over in her hands several times as she admires it.

“Why don’t you go find it a place of honor in your collection so it doesn’t get lost?”

Rina nods solemnly and heads for the bedroom to do as her father suggested.

Zed steps over to me and murmurs under his breath, “What the hell is going on?”

“I heard something in the woods this afternoon. I thought maybe that bear came back, so I kept her inside.”

He’s standing too close to me. I can feel heat from his body. I can smell the familiar natural scent of him.

I suddenly want to touch him, so I ease back slightly, putting a little more distance between us.

If he notes my retreat, he doesn’t comment on it. “Damn it. I thought it moved on.”

“Me too. Maybe it wasn’t the bear, but I wasn’t going to risk it. I didn’t see anything, but there was something moving.”

“Okay. I’ll go look after dinner. If it insists on lurking, I’ll have to kill it.”

Zed was never much of a hunter the way my stepdad was. He doesn’t like to kill animals, but he’ll do it if he has to.

We’ll be safer with the bear dead, but I’m not too keen on Zed going out to search for it. The hunting rifle will give him a clear advantage, but still…

I want to argue, but I suppress the instinct. If Zed is set on doing something, nothing I say will make a dent in his resolve. For a guy who’s supposed to be laid-back, he sure is stubborn.

Nodding to acknowledge what he said, I turn back to the stew I’ve been occasionally stirring in the pot on the woodstove. “I thought we could cut up one of the fish you caught today to add to the stew.”

“Better do both. They’re really small.” He shakes his head, and I understand it as unhappiness with today’s catch.

The fewer the fish, the sooner we’ll have to move.

And neither one of us wants to do that.

* * *

Dinner is cheerful because Rina is so pleased with her prep work for the stew. The food itself is filling but bland. We ran out of salt and pepper last year, so all we’ve got for seasoning is a variety of vinegars.

Zed is quieter than normal. He usually keeps up a steady conversation with Rina, but tonight he’s rather broody. Thinking about the bear, no doubt.

The bear is just one more item in the long list of my worries, so I’m able to interact normally, talking to Rina about the book we’ve been reading together (The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe) and speculating about what Buddy must think about his new home.

After dinner, Zed gets the girl into bed fairly quickly, and I read with her for about a half hour. It’s hard for me to concentrate on the story since I’m acutely aware of Zed’s being outside with his rifle.

He’s looking for the bear right now. What if it finds Zed first?

I manage not to panic until our normal reading time is over. Rina wants a kiss good night, which I oblige even though I’m not a touchy person. I wouldn’t hurt her feelings for the world.

Finally I’m able to close the door of the bedroom. I pull out my gun as I step outside the cabin and look around.

It’s nearly dark now. Zed isn’t going to be able to see anything in the woods. What the hell is he even thinking?

Just like a man. Wandering off in the dark by himself, being macho at the risk of leaving his daughter and me entirely on our own.

I want to go look for him, but I’m not leaving this cabin. Not when Rina is sleeping in here alone.

Buddy has come outside with me, and he glances up at me curiously, as if waiting to see what I’ll do.

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