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“I mean thatyou always get standoffish when I try to encourage you not to get angsty orbrooding about...about your past. If you get to make sure I value myself, it’sonly fair that I get to do the same with you.”

Ander’sexpression was very still for a moment. But then he relaxed into a wry smile.“I’m not sure why I ever thought dating you was such a good idea. You’re sureto drive me crazy before a year is out.”

Lori laughed,in relief, in reaction to the aftermath of tension, and in genuine amusement.“I assure you that goes both ways.”

They startedskating again, and Lori tried to overcome her rush of tenderness and affectionso she could finally carry out her plan.

It wasn’t alarge-scale or dramatic plan. She just wanted to find out why Ander didn’t wantto have sex with her yet. And since he’d never been a forthcoming man, she wasafraid a direct confrontation would backfire. So she’d suggested they go iceskating to give her the opportunity to ask him smaller questions and give himthe chance to share in small doses.

And then maybeshe could piece together what was going on.

They skated incompanionable silence for a while until Lori asked with impressive casualness.“Did you think it was weird when I asked you to go ice skating the first time?”

Ander shot hera quick, sharp look, but he answered easily enough. “I was a little surprised,but by that time you’d already asked to do other things with me, so I wasn’tflabbergasted.”

She snickeredat his choice of words but was quick to follow-up. “Were you flabbergasted whenI asked you the first time to go out somewhere, rather than just going to thehotel?”

With ahalf-shrug, Ander admitted, “Yes. You’d said all along you didn’t want topretend with me and you didn’t want to do anything that would feel like a date.I assumed you wouldn’t change in that. Why did you?”

Since it wasn’tfair to expect him to share without sharing herself, she answered honestly, “Iwas a mess over finding out your real identity. You’d become more and more realto me as our sessions went on, and that was the last straw. It just felt socheap and dirty getting together just for sex.”

Because she waslooking up at him, she caught a flicker of something like pain on his face. “Itfelt cheap and dirty to you?”

“No!” shegasped, realizing he’d misunderstood. “Being with you didn’t feel that way. Itwas that I was paying you for sex. It felt like I was using you the way everyoneelse had always used you, and I hated myself for that. But not enough to stop.I didn’t want to give you up. So the dates were the only compromise I couldlive with.”

Ander let out asmall breath. “I see.”

When he didn’tcontinue, Lori prodded him. “So did you want to go on those dates with me orwere you happier for it just to be sex?”

He pulled to asudden stop, bringing her to a halt too. He put his arms out to keep herbalanced and held her eyes with an unwavering gaze. “I was thrilled when youchanged the routine. You know by now that, at that point, I was...I was crazyabout you. You were my only client, and I longed to get rid of the professionalside of the relationship. I didn’t know how. And I had to hope the dates were asign that you were trying to change our relationship too.

Lori made surenot to show any dramatic reaction to his words, even though her pulse poundedand her heart soared. He didn’t open up easily, and she couldn’t make himuncomfortable now that he had. She just gave him a little smile. “They were. Iwanted to change it too. I was just too scared to admit it to myself because Ithought it was impossible.”

He returned hersmile and suggested they wrap up the skating. Lori agreed, since her legs weregetting tired and she had more stages of her plan to carry out.

So far, thingswere going wonderfully well, and she hoped that by the end of the night shewould be in bed with Ander again.

And, evenbetter, finally hear him put all of his feelings into words.

** *

They were walking from the icerink to Ander’s favorite Italian restaurant when Lori asked into the peacefulsilence that had lingered between them, “What did you think when I asked you togo with me to Quebec?”

“What?” Anderhad his hand on the small of her back as they walked, and he glanced down witha quizzical look.

“You heard me,”she insisted. “I was just thinking of what you told me about when I asked youto ice skate, and I was wondering what you thought when I asked you to go withme to Quebec.”

Ander narrowedhis eyes warily. “But that was before all the dates.”

“I know,” Lorisaid, frowning. “Is there some rule about my having to ask questions in chronologicalorder?”

With a chuckle,Ander relented, “I was...I was glad that you asked me. But you already knowthat.”

Her frowndeepened. “I have some thoughts, based on what I know now. I had no idea at thetime, but now I think back and I can see that maybe you were ...” She clearedher throat and concluded a little shyly, “Maybe you were fishing for theinvitation.”

“I was,” headmitted, his voice dry rather than sentimental. “As soon as I got even thesmallest hint that you were trying to work up to an invitation, I dideverything I could to make myself available.”

She giggled.“Even acted like you didn’t remember which weekend I was planning to go?”

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