Careful. Do not go there.
“I am just joking,” she clarified, laughing awkwardly. “Just a joke.”
“Right, a joke.” He laughed along, sensing the conversation falling terribly flat. “Very amusing.”
“Ah… thank you?”
Silence. A predictable one. And a most unwelcome one at that.
The two stood awkwardly, looking everywhere but at one another, the tension between them building. So intense was it that Benedict very nearly announced that he had somewhere he needed to be, figuring anywhere must be better than this.
He did not, however. Rather, he forced himself to look at Selina, seeing in her eyes just how nervous she was—she could barely even look at him. She might have found the bravery to come and see him, but that was where it ended.
If Benedict wanted them to move on from this most undesirable moment, it would be on him to do it. Not an easy task, for he had never been very good with words…
“Listen,” he began, exhaling as if to dispel the awkwardness. “About what I said the other night?—”
“You do not have to,” she said quickly, sounding relieved. “Really, there is no need to?—”
“What I said to you,” he spoke over her, “I thought it was what you wanted. And whether it was or not, the way I treated you afterward was abhorrent, and for that I am sorry.”
“You… you are?”
“I should not have kicked you out the way I did. And I certainly should not have avoided you since—making you feel like an outsider in your own home. This marriage might not be what either of us had in mind, but it does not have to be painful.”
She laughed. “That is one word I would use.”
He grinned. “It is for that reason that I think we should call a truce, of sorts.”
“Oh?”
“A call to civility,” he continued. “Just because this marriage has an end date does not mean we cannot be civil to one another. It certainly does not mean we must avoid each other either.”
She considered his suggestion. “About this end date. You were not very clear on what that means exactly.”
It had been a rushed proposition at the time, and even Benedict had not been entirely certain of the details. A desire to put this circumstance behind him because he felt that he must, and he had said what he thought he needed to.
And he still thought the same. Even if in the face of Selina’s beauty, as memories of the last time they had spoken flashed through his mind, he could not convince himself of why that was.
“I take it that you still feel the same?” he asked carefully, looking right at her as he searched for the truth in her words. “That, in two months, we should separate.”
“Of course,” she said quickly. “You have made it clear how you feel about this marriage, and I am of the same mind.” Her eyes flicked over him before she looked away. “An end date. Whatever that might look like.”
“It does not have to be anything official,” he began slowly. “In fact, that might be for the best. If we were to annul this marriage, people would talk, which is the exact opposite of what we need.”
“So, what do you propose?”
“As I said before, a separation, of sorts. I own many estates throughout the country, and there is no reason that you cannot choose one to live in. We will still be married on paper, but we simply will not have to see one another.”
“So, similar to how things are right now?”
He laughed. “Only you will not have to worry about seeing my ugly face lurking around the corner wherever you go.”
She laughed softly at that. “I like the sound of that—having my own home, I mean. Not…” She grimaced awkwardly. “Not what you said about your face.”
“I suppose that goes without saying.”
She shook her head, and for the first time, she looked at him.Reallylooked at him. By now, she must have been used to his scars, so he did not expect her to wince or curl her lip in disgust. And truthfully, she never really had—her fear was usually caused by his actions.