Page 69 of Embattled Return

Marigold reached out and rested her hand on the older woman’s. “Are you okay?”

Grandma nodded. “Just a little tired. I’ll head to bed in a little while and read for a bit.”

“Sexy books tonight or bible books?” she asked with a giggle, remembering the book shelf in Nancy’s bedroom near her bed.

“Oh, definitely the sexy books tonight. It will help me dream of my W.C.,” she grinned. “You kids have a good night.”

Without saying anything, they headed up the stairs to her apartment. Logan didn’t even pause at the door to his room. Once inside her place, they hung their coats and took off their shoes. “Want a cup of tea or hot chocolate?”

Logan shook his head. “I might do a glass of water.”

“Gotcha.”

They settled onto the couch and when he opened his arm, she leaned against him with a sigh. “What a day,” she breathed, recounting everything they’d done in her head.

He snorted, but it sounded exasperated rather than humorous. “Agreed. I’ll be honest, today didn’t go as well as I’d hoped.”

“Yeah, I’m sorry about that, Logan.”

“It’s not your fault. You have nothing to be sorry about. It was my fuck-up.”

She drew back to look at him. “You need to stop taking on all this guilt. It wasn’t your fault you got hit with an IED.”

“I know,” he admitted, “but I should have gone to talk to her sooner.”

Marigold shook her head. “It wouldn’t have mattered. You’re alive and her son is dead. Period. I hate to be so blunt, but she was looking for an outlet. She needed an outlet.”

Logan blinked and stared sightlessly out the far window. “Yeah, I know you’re right. It’s just incredibly hard to let it go.”

“I do understand that,” she said, reaching for his hands. “But I’m here with you now, and I have no plans to go anywhere.”

“Why not?” he asked abruptly, giving her a hard look.

“What?”

“Why are you with me?” he asked her, his blue eyes dark with some emotion. “I’m a seriously fucked up dude. Honestly. My family is a damn daytime soap, my personal life is not much better. I’m permanently disabled and I’m going to need a lifetime of care. Why would you even consider being with me?”

Would he freak out if she told him she loved him? And that he felt like the half of her soul that she hadn’t even noticed was missing? “Because you keep life interesting,” she said instead, taking the coward’s way out.

Logan’s expression chilled a little and she thought he seemed a little disappointed. She wondered if she should have just admitted everything to him? It was crazy, because they’d only been together a week, a little less. It just seemed longer. And not in a bad sense. Being with him made her very happy. It made her feel...settled inside, like she’d been waiting for him.

“I like, love,” she said carefully, “the direction this is going. I want to pursue it and see where it takes us.”

He looked at her for a long moment, his expression guarded, before he nodded. “I do, too. You’re very easy to be around,” he said quietly, “and I feel like I should fight against it to keep myself safe, but I really don’t want to.”

Marigold gave him a serious look. “I need you to be straight with me, though.”

“About?”

She drew in a breath. “If you’re getting thoughts of hurting yourself, I need to know about it. My mother pretended everything was great until she broke, and I never had any indication that she wanted to hurt herself. I know this is a big ask, but you have to try. I can’t be blindsided by that again.”

Logan nodded once, his gaze steady. “I swear to you that I will. Right now, even with what happened today, I still feel moderately solid. It helped to talk to John, and he gave me some ideas to distract and redirect my thoughts. I also have to have counseling if I hire onto LNF.”

Marigold sat back, startled. She wasn’t sure if she was more surprised by his openness or the fact that John had given him the guidance. “That’s really good,” she said eventually. “And completely right. I haven’t even been to school yet and it sounds like good advice.”

Logan gave her a smile. “You’re important to me, Marigold Lee, and I will be here for you.”

Tears filled her eyes at the words, and she wondered when she’d gotten so emotionally invested. As soon as he had walked in the door of the office, she thought, and something in her heart had clicked.

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