Page 76 of Empress of Savages

He says, “Two trucks got taken. They were on the road since yesterday.” Then, hesitant, “It’s the right decision to close everything down. I should have done that a week ago.”

I touch his shoulder. “It’s hard, though. Everybody needs to pay their rent. Cover their bills.”

His mouth purses. “Everybody knows they need a war chest for times like this.”

“Still. It will be tough on a lot of people. We can’t even say how long it will be.”

I tell him, “Memories of the night of the crash have been seeping back to me. They come mostly in flashes and bursts.” He strokes my hair. Pulls me to his chest. I feel safe there.

About my recovery, he wants to know, I know he does. But he doesn’t want to hear about it. It makes it all too real. But I do need to talk it through.

“I have to tell you about this. I have to say it to put it into some kind of order.” I look in his eyes, “So please, drink a beer and listen. Maybe you can watch a game. I don’t know if I need you to be concentrating.”

“It’s okay.” He folds me in his arms. “I’m a big boy. I can even be quite brave if I have to.”

As I squeeze hard against him, I remember times I’ve seen him run, straight into gunfire. Mostly to protect me.

“Yes. I press my lips to his for a delicious moment. “You can.”

And I feel like I’m opening up as I start to tell him. “At first all I remember is the crunch, the impact, and the howling twist of metal. Something huge and very hard slammed into the side of me. The whole world flipped over and around. Like I was tumbling underwater, everything slowed down. Slow roll. Slow fall.

“Everything rolls to a stop. Then more noise.

“Sirens, screeching tires, smashes, crashes and violent lurching. Hands and arms reach in. They’re all over me. I’m pulled. Grappled, manhandled.

“Whirling lights flash through the noise and blur of motion, all around me. Racing in beats and pulses.”

His strong arm enfolds me. I burrow into him for a moment. But then, I need to sit up.His hand holds mine, and his eyes are with me as I let it all out.

“I’m being taken. Dragged out and strapped onto a board or a stretcher. Then shoved and wheeled backwards, fast and headfirst, up a ramp. In through black, rectangular space, bumping through the rear doorway of an ambulance.

“Some hasty strapping, fastening, and buckling. Sirens start up. They yowl and crackle. The doors slam and the ambulance lurches forward. Rocks and swerves, charging at speed through the night traffic.

“Pain, hot and raw, bursts out, erupts all over me. I remember it like noise. Blasts of unbearable howling.”

My fists clench and I and chew my lip. “A face leans over me, too close. A hard voice with hot breath, asking questions I don’t understand. Insisting. Demanding.

“I can’t make out the words.

“Then the bang and a sickening swerve, and the noise. And it all starts over.”

I gasp. “Smash, roll, noise, hands. Grappling. Pulling. Race. Crash. Bang. Roll.

“Repeat.

“The second time, it feels like the figures that take me are darker. Covered. Black.”

Trying to remember this is all too much stress. As more parts of it come back to light, I try to concentrate but it makes me weary. I feel like I’m filled with sand, and water is pouring in, soaking the sand. Making it heavier.

Then a light goes on in my head.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

Isit up straight. “Now I remember how it started.” I hold his hand in both of mine and I lean forward.

“A call came in from a snitch. You remember? I hate snitches.”

His eyes gleam as he listens. I don’t know how much of this he already knows, but this is the only way I can put it all together in my own mind.