Page 34 of Totally Opposed

“Not in the pool,” I yell, but he waves a hand above his head.

“I’m good. Just need air. And for you fuckers to stop talking about it. Change the subject already.”

Stevie is shuffling the cards and starts to deal them out. “So, we’re pregnant again,” he declares as the second card drops in front of me.

“Man, that’s amazing. Congratulations,” I say, and he smiles and nods, but he doesn’t look all that excited. Shit. Did I read the room wrong? He has a kid with his girlfriend, Bella. The kid isonly a few months old, but still. You would think a second would be great news, wouldn’t you?

“Am I missing something? I ask.

“She’s due while we’re on tour, isn’t she?” Harry asks, and Stevie takes a long measured breath.

“Yep, right in the middle this time, so there’s no doubt I’ll miss at least some of the tour.”

The guys are apologizing, and I’m just sitting here like, what the fuck?

“Dude, you’re kidding right?” I say, and all eyes move to me.

“You’re young, you don’t get it,” Stevie says, and I scoff.

“I’m almost thirty, fuck head, and I don’t thinkyouget it. You bloody created a whole human being, a person that didn’t exist, and you’re pissed you might miss a few games of baseball when they take their first breaths in this world. Seriously?”

The guys all stare at me with open mouths like fish, waiting for the bait to come to them.

“They won’t know if I’m not there,” he reasons, and I want to slap him, he’s so thick.

“She will. Bella will. She’ll remember forever that you put a game above bringing your child into the world. You were there for the other one, right?”

“Yeah,” he says, and his brow furrows a little. “It took forever. Bella was a trooper through it all. She didn’t even take the drugs when they offered them. And fuck, you think babies are small and they are, but they’re so big, too, like when you think about how they get out. And then they do get out and they open their eyes and look at you and it’s…surreal. Like until that moment, you would do anything for fun. I went bungee jumping in Bali a few years back, remember? Oh, and cliff diving. I swam with sharks at that theme park, too. But then this tiny baby looks at you and you love it instantly. You want to protect it, you can’t even imagine putting yourself in a dangerous position everagain, except for them. You would die for them, no…you wouldkillfor them.”

“Dude, that’s a little dark, but yeah, see? So don’t you think you’re being a bit of a prick about this next one?”

“You’re right,” Stevie finally says, pulling out his phone. On the home screen is a picture of his girlfriend and daughter. “Fuuuuck. I messed up big with Bella.”

“How?” Gordon asks, and Stevie drops the deck on the table and covers his face with his hands.

“I got into this huge argument before I came here about how the game is important, too, and it matters to me and that she should be able to see that.”

“You fucking didn’t,” I say, trying not to laugh. But it is funny. It’s funny because it’s so fucking stupid. Like I get that this is the sport we love, but it’s a sport. It’s a game. In no universe should this game be more important than the people in our lives who matter most to us.

“Yeah, you fucked up. So how do we fix it?” I ask.

“We?” Stevie repeats, removing his hands from his face and looking around the table.

“Yeah, we,” Alan replies, and the rest of the guys agree, too.

I push back my chair and stand from the table. “I have an idea,” I say, and they stand too. “You’ve seen those flash mob things, right?”

“Yeah,” they reply.

“How about we do that tomorrow, before the flight? What’s her favorite song?”

“Some Taylor Swift love song. She plays it all the time.”

“Perfect, you find the song. Guys, let’s move this table. We’ve got rehearsing to do.”

***

I was first on the bus last year when we left for our tour and would have been first through the security checkpoint this time around, too, had it not been for the dance number we have planned to get Stevie out of the doghouse with his girlfriend. So now I’m just standing around in the open area under the clock at Savannah Hilton Head Airport. They call this space Savannah Square, and while most airports have all the food, shopping, and amenities tucked away behind the security checkpoint, in this section, there are restaurants, a Starbucks, and a few shops to spend some time in if you need to wait for a family member to arrive. The clock hanging down from the middle of the tall glass ceiling is my favorite part. It looks like an old clock I would see back home.