Page 121 of Secret Love

“Did you say yes?” I ask.

She smirks. “You wish. No, I did not say yes, you sexy, hot fool.”

My lips form into a pout without me even trying. “Well, that stings.”

“If we ever get to that place, it’ll be when you remember asking, and you’ll have to see what I say then.” She pokes me in the chest and I take her finger and bite it, which makes her yelp.

My mom knocks on the door then and walks in with a tray of soup and crackers.

“I thought I heard you awake in here,” she says. “How’s my boy?”

“Apparently I am making all kinds of declarations in my addled state,” I say. “But otherwise, I’m doing all right.”

“He threw up when he woke up,” Tru tells my mom, which causes a round of Mom tutting and fussing and babying. Tru widens her eyes when I frown at her. “What? She’d want to know.”

“Of course, I do. My poor baby,” Mom coos. “Should we call the doctor?”

I lean my head back, groaning. Mom insisted on coming to help and I agreed so Tru wouldn’t feel pressured to do anything, but she took off a few days of work anyway. I adore my mom and love the way she and Tru have bonded, but the two of them nursing me might send me over the edge. Especially when I feel like such shit company.

“No. I’m fine. You don’t need to fuss over me, okay?” I tell my mom as she places the tray on the bed. “Dr. Grinstead willbe stopping by later…in fact, I’ll be bombarded with all kinds of help from the medical team over the next couple of weeks.” I put my hand on Mom’s arm. “I love you. Don’t worry.”

Her chin wobbles and she pats my hand. “How can I not? You scared us to death when you were clobbered by that player.” She frowns. “Actually, I’ve been fearful every single game I’ve watched you play. This just feels like our worst fears are coming true. I know you love that game so much and it’s been incredible, all that you’ve accomplished, but haven’t you had enough now?”

I gape at her. “Whether I’ve had enough or not, I may not have a choice.” She winces and I grab her when she starts to pull away. “I’m sorry, Mom. You’re right. I’m just…I don’t know what to say about it right now.”

She nods. “I know, honey. It’s a lot to take in. You’ve had such an amazing run. I just hate the toll it takes on your body.” She lifts her hand when I start to say something. “I know you act like you don’t bleed, but youdo. There’s no way your body can get bashed countless times and you not live with untold pain, day in and day out.” Her chin wobbles again and I feel like shit for making my mom cry. “You do a really good job of hiding it and not ever complaining, but I’m your mother. I know you, and I’m ready for you to take care of yourself.”

She pats my cheek and turns to go.

“Let me know if something besides soup sounds good. I’ve got oatmeal raisin cookies in the oven that I should go check on.”

“I can never resist your oatmeal raisin cookies. I love you, Mom.”

She smiles at me. “I know you do. And I loveyou.”

I eat a little bit of soup and Tru helps me into the bathroom. I think she can tell I need some time alone after that conversation with my mom. She sets out my toiletries where they’re easier to reach and walks to the door. I’m not supposed to shower yet, so I won’t be in here long, but I start by grabbing the toothpaste.

“I’ll just be right in there if you need me,” she says, motioning toward the bedroom.

“It’s like I’m grieving the me I’ve been.” It comes rushing out and Tru steps back in. “I’m not taking what my mom said lightly. Regardless of what anyone is saying about my future, I know that I’m either done now or I will be soon. I’ve gone longer than most players do at this level. I’m just not sure who I am without football.”

She comes and stands behind me, wrapping her arms around me, as we stare at each other in the mirror.

“You’re the man I fell in love with. You’re the best dad I’ve ever known. You’re the friend everyone can count on. You’re smart and funny and successful because you’re Henley Ward, and Henley Ward is agood person.”

She kisses my shoulder and I kiss her hair.

“You’re going to figure the rest out. Your life isn’t over, even if your football career might be. There’s a lot more you’re meant to do.” She smiles up at me and I wrap my arms around her, hugging her tight.

“I don’t know what I did to deserve you, tiny dancer.”

“Think about all the things I just told you. I’m the lucky one.”

“We’ll have to agree to disagree on that.”

CHAPTER FORTY

SHAPES AND SIZES

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