Page 14 of Redeeming Heart

The night started slow but picked up later the night and soon it has gotten chaotic.

Being a person who doesn’t share a lot of feelings or emotions with the world had its advantages. Men who tried flirting quickly got the message that I am not someone they can tease or want to flirt with as I gave them the cold shoulder in a nice, respective way.

A few of the customers were Aunt Maggie’s regulars who were at least nice to serve and not feel uncomfortable around them.

I wasn’t going to ever mention this to my father but I had fun and for someone who has never worked in a bar and who isn’t a people person.

I helped the other bartenders to clean up while waiting for Aunt Maggie to finish up as she was given me a ride back home.

We didn’t get much time to talk or come to terms with seeing each other after my mom’s passing-and not like we spoke a lot during the ride home.

“Your mom would be so disappointed in me.” Aunt Maggie began as she pulled up in front of my father’s house.

“I stopped coming over because I was hurting and forgetting all about you and your father. I’ve lost a sibling while you lost your mother and your father lost the love of his life.”

I just shook my head at her. “We all lost someone we cared for and loved. She would be disappointed in all of us for not reaching out.”

She nodded at me.

“I’m sorry that you had to go through this.” She noted, her empathy bringing tears to my eyes and a wrench to my heart.

“Everyone tells me that time heals a broken heart but it has been three years and I can’t come to terms that she is gone,” I admitted with a straight face.

I looked at the house and all I want is for everything to be the way it was. I didn’t want my father to get married to Meredith. I want my mother. I want them to laugh and smile as they used to late at night sitting in the kitchen while the whole world was sound asleep.

I didn’t want him to smile at Meredith or laugh with her.

It angers me to think he is sleeping next to someone or kissing someone who isn’t my mother.

He moved on while I hung back clinging to the past.

“I am still flustered about the way she had to deal with this crap her whole life but she lived it like she could be taken away any minute and here we are just being here.” Aunt Maggie’s eyes were filled with pain and sadness.

Mine was filled with anger and regret. “I am still angry with her that she never told me. I let her do stuff that she wasn’t allowed to do. If I just knew she would have lived longer.” My voice was quivering from all the rage I’d built up over the years.

“No!” Aunt Maggie exclaimed reaching for me. “If she told you right from the beginning you would have not lived in the moments you had with her.”

“I am still not living according to what I should. My life crumbled the day she was taken away from us and my father…” I couldn’t even utter the reality of him betraying her out loud.

“I should go.” I suddenly said, reaching for the door and pushing it open to get out. “I will see you tomorrow.”

I hate talking about the future while I am still clinging to the past.

Boundaries still lay ahead of me and I didn’t even know what is the first step to overcome the first boulder.

CHAPTER EIGHT

I survived my first week of my father’s so-called way of straightening me out and it hasn’t been all bad, and honestly, it was fun hanging out with Aunt Maggie again.

The late nights, the busy bar, and having to forget a few hours of my miserable life.

My thoughts fell away when I heard a loud cry. Raising my gaze, I found it was Jonah who was down and sprawled out on his tummy while everyone laughed at him.

I was ready to climb over this barrier and teach each of them a lesson but I had to suppress my anger for Jonah’s sake. I didn’t get why his teammates were treating him like dirt when a team should have each other’s backs at all times.

The coach scolded everyone and at least offered to help Jonah up but Jonah refused. He grabbed his hockey stick and made his way over to where I was waiting for him.

He was making a mistake.

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