Page 61 of Chase Our Forever

Clara and Liv are in birthday hats with a birthday banner strung up behind them.

“Surprise!” Clara yells, holding her hands out wide. The birthday hat goes a little lopsided with the movement, but she doesn’t care to fix it.

I can’t move as my eyes roam the space in front of me. There’s a birthday cake sitting in front of the girls with candles carefully placed all around the top. There’s a wrapped present sitting next to it.

A flash of movement catches my attention. Clara runs to me, her arms wrapping around my legs as she gives me a big squeeze. “It’s my mama’s birthday today, Daddy. Livvy said we should celebrate.”

My throat feels tight as I take a step back in shock.

She’d planned a birthday celebration for Selena.

I open my mouth to say something, but no words come out. Emotion clogs my throat at the sheer thoughtfulness of the sight in front of me.

“Daddy?” Clara says, pulling her head back so she can look up at me. “Do you like it? We decorated, and we made cake!” She jumps up and down at the word “cake.”

My eyes lock with Liv’s, and so many things run through my head. The biggest being I have no idea what I did right in my life to deserve her. She never met Selena. I didn’t even know she was aware when Selena’s birthday was. Yet, here she is, making sure that I’m doing what I told her I wanted to do—celebrate Selena’s life instead of focusing on her death.

“I love it,” I finally manage to get out as Clara grabs my hand in hers. My words come out gritty and nowhere near as composed as they should be, but I don’t care. I hope that Liv can hear the emotion in my words.

Clara pulls me all the way to the counter, where a messily decorated birthday cake sits that reads “Happy birthday Mama.” My eyes burn as I take it all in.

“I decorated the cake myself,” Clara announces proudly. “Up,” she demands. Liv takes the cue and lifts her onto the counter so she can get a closer look at the cake. Clara’s brown eyes focus right on me as the most adorable grin spreads across her cheeks. “You like it? I didn’t know Mama’s favorite color, so I did mine.”

I laugh a little, taking in the lopsided dollops of icing all over the cake. “This is…” My words die because I have no idea what to say.

I look at Liv again, finding her watching me carefully. She’s got her hands over her mouth as her eyes cautiously scan my face. “Is it okay?” she asks quietly, her nerves evident with the shakiness of her question.

A wave of emotion I haven’t felt in years washes over me at the tenderness and cautiousness in her voice. The fact she would even question if this was okay or not really speaks to how caring she is about others. “Of course,” I answer, my voice gritty. “It’s more than okay. I can’t believe you…” It seems like I can’t even finish sentences. I’m in such shock by what she’s planned.

I sigh as I blink a few times. My eyes burn with unshed emotion. I open them again and meet Liv’s caring blue gaze. “Thank you,” I croak. “Just thank you.”

She rubs her lips together as she tries to fight a smile. It’s clear she’s not great at just accepting my gratitude. If only she knew how much this gesture meant to me. I was so concernedabout how to properly celebrate Selena today when all along, Liv knew just what to do.

“Pippa baked the cake because I’m a terrible baker. Hattie told me Selena’s favorite was chocolate, so that’s what we went with. And then, well, Clara beautifully did the decorating, as you can tell.”

I stare at her. I should look at the cake, but I can’t look away from her. It isn’t lost on me how much planning she must’ve done to do this. Asking Hattie Selena’s favorite flavor, recruiting Pippa for help, she went above and beyond for today, and I don’t even know how to begin to thank her.

“We also got Mama a present!” Clara declares, lifting the present from the counter and pushing it into my chest.

I look down at the neatly wrapped gift. It’s got a bow on the top and simple yellow wrapping paper.

My eyes move from Clara to Liv, unsure if I’m supposed to open it or not. Luckily, my daughter decides for me. She grabs a corner of the wrapping paper and pulls, revealing part of what’s inside. It looks to be a large book of some sort.

“We worked really hard on this, Daddy,” Clara tells me, her voice totally serious.

“Did you?” I ask, still trying to get my emotions together enough for whatever’s inside. My mind still reels from how thoughtful it was for Liv to do this. I can’t move past it. I can’t move past how incredibly lucky I feel to have her in my life. To have her with me navigating the hard moments of life. Especially the ones like today, where I had no idea how to honor the amazing woman Selena was with the beautiful daughter we created and not make it too sad.

“Everyone helped. Mimi, Papa, Aunt Hattie,everyone.” Clara emphasizes the last one to really let me know how many people were involved.

I carefully pull the rest of the wrapping paper off until I’m left with a large book.

“It’s a rapbook,” Clara announces proudly, leaning over the book to get a better look.

Liv laughs. “Scrapbook,” she corrects, her tone gentle.

Clara looks at Liv for a moment. “Yeah. Scrapbook. Just like I said.”

Liv and I share a smile. That’s definitely not what she said to begin with, but we let her believe it is.

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