Page 21 of Chase Our Forever

She steps forward, her fingers running along the off-white comforter.

“So…it’ll work?” I repeat, needing the peace of mind of knowing she’ll be happy here. “You have your own bathroom and closet.”

Liv’s eyes meet mine. She’s quiet for a moment as she stares at me. I get an overwhelming urge of longing to know exactly what’s going through her head. I want to know how this room—this house—looks through her eyes.

I want her to stay on as Clara’s nanny for as long as possible. The cards have aligned, and I just know Selena would’ve loved her for Clara. I can feel it in my bones.

So I want this to work. For Liv to be comfortable here.

“It’ll more than work. It’s perfect. I’m sorry—typically, I’m great with words. I’ve always been a little on the chattier side.” She sighs, her eyes roaming the room once before she looks at me again. “I just can’t quite find the right words now other than this room ismorethan enough.”

I give her a curt nod. I don’t know how to respond to her, having the same problem as she does. Except, unlike her, I canneverfind the right words. I’d much rather say nothing at all. “It’s nothing.”

She rolls her eyes, choosing not to say anything. Instead, she walks up to Clara, who is still gleefully making snow angels on the bed. “Show me your room now?” she asks, playfully grabbing Clara’s foot and pulling her across the mattress.

“Finally!” Clara shouts, her tone full of drama, as if she’s been waiting hours instead of minutes to show Liv her room. She drops her Barbies to the ground, no longer interested in them.

“Then let’s do it,” Liv demands, letting Clara jump onto her back for a piggyback ride.

13

LIV

“I can’t believeyou wake up to this view every morning,” I marvel, leaning over the banister of the back porch of the house. In front of us is a beautiful watercolor painting of reds, yellows, oranges, and even touches of green. Calling this a backyard seems like an insult.

There are rolling hills you can see for miles, the mountaintops reflecting on the pond that sits not too far from the back of the house. There’s even a barn to our right with a wood fence right next to it.

Dean’s quiet next to me for a few moments, his eyes tracing over the same view as mine as he thinks over my words. He and Clara spent the morning walking me through the house and showing me where everything is. I had time to unpack my things and ask any questions I had before Clara went down for a nap twenty minutes ago. She fought it hard, wanting to stay up to show me around more before Dean finally convinced her to give in. “It really is a beautiful view, isn’t it?” he finally responds, his voice a little rough.

“The most breathtaking one I’ve ever seen. I don’t know if I’d ever leave the house if this is what I had to leave.”

This makes him laugh, the sound coming from deep in his chest. It’s the first time I’ve heard him laugh. It seems like a monumental moment that I got him to do it. It was the smallest laugh imaginable. Barely a laugh by some standards, probably, but I’m going to count it. He’s been short and closed-off since we met, which I understand, but it’s nice to see him let his guard down slightly, even if just for a brief moment.

His hands wrap around a red mug as he brings it to his lips. I hold a similar one, enjoying the coffee he made me. “Spend enough time in this town and the people here will comment how I don’t like to leave the house often.”

I nod, holding my tongue to tell him I’ve already been made aware of his tendencies to stay home. “I don’t blame you. This view just doesn’t seem real.”

He lets out a long sigh, his shoulders sagging a little as he places his forearms on the railing. “The view does make you seem small, doesn’t it?”

I watch him for a moment. I don’t know what I was expecting him to say, but it wasn’t that. He’s been so quiet, keeping his thoughts to himself. He took me by surprise, but before I can respond, he stands back up and clears his throat. “Do you have any questions on where anything is? I know I showed you a lot.”

I shake my head. I know I won’t remember everything he told me today, but I know the important things—where I’m sleeping and the gist of where things are to take care of Clara. I’ll spend the rest of today and all day tomorrow getting the hang of their routine before being with her fully on Monday. I’ll definitely be able to figure things out.

“I think I’m good for the most part. I appreciate you taking the time to show me around. Everyone in the town has mentioned how busy you are, so I appreciate you taking time out of your day to help me get comfortable.”

His jaw clenches, almost as if he’s annoyed by my words. I shift on my feet awkwardly, wondering if I said something wrong. I just wanted to thank him, to let him know I appreciate his generosity today. Maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned the fact I spoke with others in town about him.

“You’ll be living here. Of course I needed to show you around and make sure you’re comfortable finding things on your own.” His voice is gruff. We haven’t spent a ton of time together, but I’m learning very quickly how he often gets straight to the point.

I nod in understanding. He has a point. I’m just not used to people being thoughtful, even if there’s a reason for it. I swallow, thinking about another nice thing he did for me that we haven’t discussed yet.

I shift on my feet, not knowing how to broach the subject but knowing I have to. Even though I’m not used to people doing nice things for me, it doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate it.

“Thank you for offering a salary that I feel is far more than what I’m qualified for. And on top of that, thank you for paying for my stay at Sutten Inn,” I manage to get out, my words a little rushed from nerves. “That wasn’t necessary at all.”

Dean turns, his body now fully facing me. He leans his elbow against the wood railing, his eyebrows drawn as he takes me in. I don’t know if I want to know what’s going through his head or if I’m relieved I don’t know. Either way, I wait with bated breath for whatever he’s going to say next.

It seems like he takes forever to answer me. I want to fold underneath his intense gaze. I try to look away from him as I wait for him to say something, but my eyes only get as far as staring at his chiseled jaw. A muscle in it ticks against his jawline, and for some reason, I can’t look away from it.

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