Page 8 of The Road to Finding Us

My lips purse as I think his words through. It really doesn’t make sense for the two of us to drive down there alone, and if it were any other human on this earth, I’d be happy with the suggestion. But I’m scared for my sanity—and maybe my heart—that a road trip with Aspen could have repercussions. The kind I might not be ready for. But the more I ponder it, the more I don’t want to be the one to back down to him. If I say no, will he assume it’s because I still have feelings for him? If I say no, he’ll think those feelings still exist. But if I say yes, I can prove to him—and myself—that those feelings are far in my past. Exactly where they’ll stay.

“We would split gas?” I ask tentatively, searching his face for any unease on his part.

“Sure.” His shoulders lift in a shrug.

“I get control of the music? I already made a playlist that took hours to create. I didn’t do all of that work for nothing.”

“We can share control,” he responds, taking the last step to close the distance between us, so we’re only about a foot apart from each other.

When I woke up this morning, I never thought I’d be face-to-face with my first love, let alone contemplating going on a road trip with him. But life is weird, and in truth, I wasn’t looking forward to driving all the way to South Carolina by myself.

This can strictly be a business deal. He helps me get from point A to point B—nothing else.

“Can we keep the talking to a minimum? I don’t have anything new to say to you,” I declare.

He puts his hand over his heart in mock hurt. “You wound me, Lily Bear.”

My mouth almost blurts that it can’t be more than he hurt me years ago, but I decide against it. If we’re going to spend a lot of time in a closed space together, it’s probably best not to bring up old times.

“I’m only considering this because I hate driving and I refuse to take a plane.” My finger wags in his face to help get my point across. I don’t want him to think this is anything more than a carpool.

“Understood,” he says with a curt nod. “What time should I pick you up tomorrow morning?”

“Eight,” I respond, before I even think it through.

“See you then!” he chirps, and as quickly as he barged into my space, he’s out of it. The door makes a slamming sound behind him.

Mother trucker.

It appears in the span of a single hour, my plans went from driving myself down to South Carolina, to riding down with enemy number one.

What the hell did I just agree to?

5

Lily

Past - Age Nineteen

Freshman year came and went in a blur.

It was more of the same from day to day. I spent most of my time with Maverick and Selma—and unfortunately, Aspen.

The relationship between Aspen and I hadn’t changed much from the very first day we met. Except now, I wish I had the excuse to punch him in the balls again.

He drives me nuts constantly. He’s hot and cold with the way he acts around me. One second, he’s making some kind of sexual joke about our chemistry and the next, he’s calling me his little sister. That man is more confusing than my statistics homework—and I suck at math.

It doesn’t help that he can’t keep it in his pants. I’m not sure that even if his life depended on it, he could keep his dick out of some poor innocent girl.

The more the four of us hang out, the more I see him take girl after girl home. It’s absolutely revolting.

I don’t know what’s wrong with the girls on campus, but for some reason, they like him. Judging by the way they all flock around him anywhere we go, they more than like him, which is baffling to me. There’s not much to him other than pervy jokes and okay, maybe good arms.

Once a day, I tell myself I’m fine with not spending time with my brother and my best friend, just so I can avoid Aspen. But it turns out I’m a sucker for punishment, because more often than not, I find myself with the three of them.

We’re already halfway through our sophomore year of college. Maverick, Selma, and I went home to stay with our parents during winter break. Aspen went to his hometown as well. That means it’s been one entire month without seeing Aspen. One blissful month.

The asshole wouldn’t let me forget about him, though. He sent me memes from The Office daily—which he knows is my weakness. The Dwight ones really get me giggling.

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