Page 13 of The Road to Finding Us

“Can’t say I didn’t warn you,” I remind her as I flip my blinker to pull out of her apartment complex.

“Don’t fucking talk,” she snaps, still rubbing her head.

“What, am I just not allowed to talk for the entire trip?” I question. While we wait for the light to turn green and I wait for her answer, I pull out my phone to type in a final destination.

“That would be ideal,” she sputters, finally getting her seatbelt to click in place.

I stare ahead, holding back my eyeroll.

7

Lily

Past - Age Nineteen

I’m sitting awkwardly in the corner of the crowded party, my toes dangling in the water of the heated pool. Most of the people here are huddled on the makeshift dance floor or in the hot tub, but I risked the cold toes to get some personal space. It’s still nice weather outside for us to be on the cusp of spring, and the added bonus of a heated pool helps things.

I scan over the underage college kids that surround me. Only a few feet away from me, my friend, Traci, is busy dry humping the leg of a guy on the baseball team. My nose scrunches as I move on from being a peeping Tom to the two of them. I continue to look around the party, searching for somebody I know that doesn’t have their tongue down another person’s throat.

My eyes involuntarily narrow when they land on Aspen getting touchy-feely with two girls on the dingy lawn furniture. Earlier, when Selma was looking for her shoes and he said he would see me later, I didn’t quite register what he meant.

He probably hasn’t even noticed that I’m here. He’s been too busy entertaining the girls at the party.

“Can I join you?” a voice asks from my peripheral. It breaks me from the trance of watching Aspen and his two groupies. I pull my eyes away from that train wreck, happy to find the person they land on. Blaine.

Standing in front of me is the boy I’ve had a crush on since freshman year. His blond hair is shorter than it was when we first met a year ago, but his big brown eyes are still the same.

“Blaine?” I say in disbelief. “Uh, hi. I mean sure, yeah.” So smooth, Lily.

He smiles, showing off the one crooked tooth he has. I’ve been obsessed with it since I first noticed it at a party. It adds to his charm, to his good looks.

“I’ve been looking all over for you,” he states, the denim of his jeans briefly scratching against my thigh during his attempt to sit down.

“Excuse me, what?” I blurt.

“I said, I’ve been looking all over for you.” He enunciates every word clearly, as if I’m a toddler and I only understand half of what he’s saying.

Which might be the case here because, holy fuck, Batman.

Did I hear him correctly?

Did Blaine just admit to looking for me?

Does he love me? Are we getting married?

“I’m sorry, I’m trying to process this right now.” A shriek comes from the other side of the yard and my eyes follow the noise, landing on one of Aspen’s girls. He’s untied the straps of her cover-up, exposing her almost-naked back to the party.

“Well, if we’re being honest here, I’ve had a crush on you for a while. It’s just…I’ve only now gotten the nerve to tell you.” He looks over at me and gives me a sheepish smile.

That man’s smile may be the death of me and my hormones.

“Sorry, I’m trying to play catch-up in this conversation. You? Crush on me? Please elaborate.”

“I think everyone around us knows I have a thing for you. You never seemed super interested in me, so I just held my tongue. If we’re being completely honest, I always thought you had a thing for Aspen. I was trying to respect you, not ignore you.” He looks at me and I notice how awesome his brown eyes are—a rich caramel-chocolate brown.

“You know, you have kickass eyes.” Oh my god. Did I just say that out loud?

By the way he’s laughing, I definitely said that out loud. He’s seriously doubled over right now. I’m never going to live this down. Kill. Me. Now.

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