Page 2 of Covington Acres

“No. I’m not gay. I’m attracted to you, Lu. I’m attracted to other women too. I just don’t want the same things. I can’t seem to want to settle down. That’s not in the cards for me, and you want marriage and babies soon. I don’t want to hold you back.”

Her eyes pooled with tears. His heart felt like it was being ripped apart. Maybe he could keep trying. Maybe if he married Lulu, he would fall in love with her and want a real relationship with her, rather than just being in relationships because that’s what was expected of him. But then, how was that fair to her? How could he ask her to spend her life with someone who might never be in love with her the way she deserved?

“Maybe we can try a little longer…” she said, crying now. “Maybe you’re just not ready for marriage yet. I can wait.”

Fuck, he hated this. Hated himself. He reached over and took her hand. “You deserve more than to wait around on a man like me, more than to stay with someone who can’t give you the kind of love and life you deserve. You’re better than that, Lulu. Better than me. I won’t put you through that.”

Lulu cried harder, and Colby pulled her into his arms, hugged her and shushed her, told her he was sorry and it would be okay. That she would meet a man who deserved her, one who could make all her dreams come true, one who wanted the same things.

He stayed with her for an hour before she told him she wanted to be alone. When he walked out, Colby had never been more disappointed in himself, and he knew this was just the beginning. Lulu taught yoga with goats at the farm. His family adored her. They wouldn’t understand why he’d broken up with her, and he didn’t know how to make them get something he was confused about himself. Something he was ashamed of.

When he drove home, he vowed never to do this again. He wasn’t going to date anyone, wasn’t going to risk breaking another heart just because he didn’t seem to work right.

Colby Covington was going to be alone.

Eventually his family would have to understand.

It was better this way.

CHAPTER ONE

Colby

Last summer

“So…” Vince said.“I’ve been doing my research, and apparently Briar County has its first ever gay bar.”

Vince—Holden’s best friend—had recently moved to Briar County from Atlanta. Since Colby lived alone and had zero plans on dating anymore, he’d offered Vince to be his roommate. They were getting along great so far. Vince was different from anyone Colby knew—so honest and open when it came to how he lived his life and who he was. He envied Vince that, wished he knew how to be more like him. He doubted Vince would ever be the type of guy who would live like he was a passenger rather than the driver of his own life. But Colby didn’t know how to live any other way.

“No way,” Clint replied.

Vince and Colby were at dinner with Clint, a longtime Briar County resident and one of Colby’s closest friends, and August Reynolds, a man Clint was crazy in love with, even if he hadn’t admitted it to Colby yet. August had lived here when they were kids, but Colby hadn’t met him back then, and at some point, August had moved away. August and his son, Reese, had moved back to Briar County this summer—Clint and August picking up right where they left off.

“Yeah, I was shocked,” Vince said. “I know I said I’m looking for something different, and I am, hence moving to Harmony, but it’s also boring as shit. I was going to drag this guy”—he motioned to Colby—“to Asheville, so I was looking stuff up andfound a gay bar in Chelsea. It’s only been open a few weeks. Some guy from California.”

Chelsea was one of the three main towns in Briar County, the other two being Harmony and Everett. For most of Colby’s life, the only queer person he’d ever known was Roe. He’d had an old boyfriend Colby had met but never been fond of. But now, outside of his brother, there was Deacon and Grady, Clint and August, and Vince. He sure as shit had never thought Briar County would ever have a gay bar, and the fact that it did made Colby proud of his little area of the state.

“Don’t say that too loud. Locals are already complaining about all the Californians and Northerners taking over North Carolina,” Clint joked.

August started talking about hearing people complaining about traffic in the area, while Colby mulled over what Vince said. He’d never been to a gay bar before. It wasn’t that he had a problem with it. It was just…different.

How many times have you thought how tired you are of doing the same old thing? How many times have you silently complained about not having any new experiences, and now here Vince is, offering them to you, and you’re second-guessing it.

“You guys wanna go with us?” he heard Vince ask Clint and August. “Roe and Holden are camping with the boys, and not sure it’s really Grady and Deke’s thing.”

“I never said I was going,” Colby reminded him.

“But you will,” Vince countered.

The thing was, Colby knew that no matter how much he questioned it in his head, he would go. It might have only been a short time since Vince moved in, but Colby liked that Vince shook up his world a little. Still, he said, “How do you know?” Maybe he wouldn’t go. Maybe Vince was wrong. Why did he think he knew Colby so well already?

Vince wrapped an arm around him and ruffled his hair. “Because you love me, and I’m forcing you to be my new best friend.”

Yes. I’d like that, he thought, pulling away from Vince and teasing with, “What if I don’t wanna be best friends with you?” He did, in fact, want to be good friends with Vince. Clearly Vince knew that too.

He grinned. “He’s mad because I made him eat something other than Frosted Flakes this morning.”

Colby rolled his eyes. “I don’t only eat Frosted Flakes. I like Honey Smacks, Golden Grahams, Lucky Charms, oooh! Cocoa Pebbles.” It wasn’t his fault he wasn’t a great cook and had a bit of a sweet tooth. Cereal was a universal food! It had always been his favorite.

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