Page 89 of Meet Me In The Dark

The rest they would do together.

“Oh, Ms. Blum, I know it,” Chris said.

Kara never thought she’d be grateful for delusional men, but she was now.

She felt his hand move behind her, heard the snick of his pants zipper. Followed by her men’s growls.

“Wait, I almost forgot,” Chris said. “The stabbing.”

No.

It was now or never. Now or nothing.

“Chris, how about we make a deal,” she said, letting the desperation she felt come through. “Please.”

He paused in his caresses. “What sort of deal?”

“You can force me. But you and I and everyone here will know how unwilling I was. Don’t you think your men will talk? About how I didn’t want you?”

Micah’s eyes were trained on hers, his face grim, but approving.

“And what?” She could hear Chris’s frustration, how he was trying to hide his bruised and scratched ego. She knew him. He loved being wanted—by his students, by New York’s literati. By her. Rejection never sat right with creative types.

“And I’ll fuck you—willingly. If you just give us all one more day. That’s all I’m asking for, please. One more day for us to say our goodbyes.”

More growls, more denials from Luke and Conor. She ignored them; she had to. She didn’t want to do this. Thiswas worse than Victor, worse than anything she could have imagined. The idea of willingly touching her former lover again, letting him touch her, made her want to puke all over the hard ground, cut off her own hands. She’d promised herself this would never happen again. And yet here she was. She could see the waves of her panic rising in the distance.

What would you do, for love?

For life?

She hadn’t heard that voice in a while. Her voice. Curious, gentle, encouraging.

Anything. She’d do anything.

She could do this. Shehadto do this.

She waited as Chris considered, weighing his options. Finally he said, “Alright, but you’ll have to prove yourself. Get on your knees.”

“Kara.” Conor’s voice was strained with pain and fear.

“Don’t, sweetheart,” Luke said, his own voice breaking.

She looked at all three of them, letting tears well in her eyes.

“I love you,” she said. And then, “But yes, I can. Remember? I can deepthroatanything.”

With those telling words, she turned away from them, lowering to her knees and steadying her breathing before reaching for Chris’s pants and finishing where he’d left off with unzipping them. The sound of the zipper’s teeth opening was one she’d never forget: an echoingsnick snick snickin the otherwise quiet room.

“Anything? Hmm,” Chris said, brushing her cheek with the knife again. “Seems you have new skills. Let’s test them, shall we?”

Closing her eyes, Kara pushed down his pants and briefs to his knees. It had been years since she’d seen his penis,and she’d happily have gone an eternity without seeing it again.

Instead, she gripped it in her hand, tight, stroked a few times, listening to his horrible sighs. He was the only one making sounds in the cell; everyone and everything else had gone silent, like the very building held its breath, waiting for what came next.

Kara leaned forward. And as the waves of panic threatened to rise, she banished them again.

In this moment, I am okay. I am going to be fine. All I have to do is breathe.

---