Page 35 of Rejected Plus-Size Mate

I haven’t really let loose all week. I need some kind of release.

I pause by the back door. “I need to go on a bit of a run. Would you like to come with me?”

Kyle’s eyes light up as he turns towards me. He nods eagerly, and we hurry out the back through the yard andtowards the woods. I make a concentrated effort to keep my eyes turned away when he sheds his clothes.

This is ridiculous. I need to run to get my frustration out, but I invited the source of it to come with me!

As I hit the forest paths, I stretch out and push myself into a full run. I can hear Kyle’s paws hitting the ground behind me as he tries to keep up. I push myself harder, twisting between the trees and leaping down gullies.

Kyle comes up beside me, his blue-green eyes glinting in the flickering shadows. The sun has only just gone down, and the murky twilight is rising around us, drawing us into a landscape that seems blurred and dreamlike.

I crest the rise of a small hill, and Kyle pushes his shoulder against me. My wolf responds, and I twist, wagging and bowing. He pounces, and we roll together down the hill, both of us yipping and growling as we fall.

At some point during the tumble down the hill, I feel skin instead of fur. Kyle has shifted, and so have I. A faint stab of anxiety rings through me.

There’s only one reason why that would happen.

As we reach the bottom of the hill, Kyle comes out on top. He settles above me, taking one of my hands in his and linking our fingers together. His other hand softly strokes my side.

I can feel how hard he is, and my entire body is screaming, pounding, throbbing, begging for release. The aching between my legs is shuddering through every cell, making my skin hypersensitive. Even though there is fear in my heart, I just can’t stop myself.

I reach up with my lips and kiss him. Kyle returns the kiss, softly at first, then with more passion.

His hand grips mine a little harder, and he starts to explore with his other hand. I writhe against him, feeling the heat inside me turn up to boiling point. Soft cries burst out of my mouth, and I can hear the desperation in my voice.

I need you. I can’t live without you!

But I did.

Suddenly, the whole twelve months of pain come back to me, crushing my heart. It feels like my ribs shatter, stealing all the breath from my body.

This is how it feels to cry so hard every day there is no strength left. No joy, no hope, and your body is as broken as your heart.

“Stop, stop,” I mutter, pushing him off. Kyle rolls to the side and sits up, watching me.

“Are you okay?” he asks.

I nod, not trusting my voice. I am very much not okay, but I have no idea how to explain what I’m feeling.

He said he was sorry. I can’t keep blaming him. Not now that I know why he did it.

This makes so much sense to me, but my body isn’t listening. My stomach is cramping, and tingles are running down my spine. I don’t feel safe, and that’s all there is to it.

I truly gave him everything. I opened up every last part of myself. The whole time, he was keeping himself from me, and he abandoned the parts of me that need love the most.

“Let’s just go back,” I say. “I don’t feel so good.”

Kyle nods, his face drawn with concern. He doesn’t say anything, just steps back to give me some space.

We shift and run back home, and not even the wild soul of my wolf can comfort me now. She’s howling, too, desperate for the love of her mate and fearing it can never be.

Chapter 13 - Kyle

Ever since the night Leslie let me sleep next to her, I’ve been walking around in a constant daze. At first, I was just amazed at how good it felt to open up to her. For the first time in a long time—maybe ever—I felt light, happy, and free.

It wasn’t just unburdening myself, though. It was finally being open and honest with Leslie. My desperate need to protect her, clashing against the necessity of explaining things to her, had left me completely exhausted.

Mix that with the nightmares, and I’ve got a recipe for a permanently restless man.

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