Page 126 of Forking the Billionaire

Our baby.

I’d shattered the relationship that had meant the most to me—my friendship with Gabriel. We’d been like brothers, and I was closer to him than I was to my biological brothers.

If he were anyone else, I would expect that time would help him forgive me. But not Gabriel. He let so few people intohis life, this betrayal would burn especially bright. There was a definite possibility that he would never forgive me.

The loss of that bond should have been what hurt the most. But it wasn’t.

It was losing Esme.

We’d spent only a week together, messing around, having fun. But that week had changed our relationship forever. Whether or not she wanted to admit it, we’d always been friends. She’d always been special to me.

It was her face I saw when I lay down to sleep. It was her teasing and her challenges and the little note she passed me during breakfast that filled my dreams.

Each memory was a haunting reminder of the things I didn’t say, of futures that might have been. Bitter regret lingered on my tongue.

Like her brother, Esme didn’t just hold a grudge—she clung to it like it was lathered in Gorilla Glue.

After over a decade, she still held onto a promise I didn’t remember making, let alone breaking. Me telling her I didn’t want kids, me not telling her that I knew I was the father—this time I’d screwed up far worse.

If I could go back in time and change things I would. But I couldn’t.

If I could wish for anything moving forward, it would be her happiness.

Even if she hated me, I would figure out how to step up for her baby.Ourbaby.

Even if I screwed up every step along the way. Even if what was best was sending money and not being involved in their lives, because I didn’t deserve them.

The idea of being away from them hurt even more. It was a gnawing, relentless ache that wrapped its tendrils around my heart and squeezed until I thought I might crumble.

I loved her.

The bed felt too large, the room too quiet, and my soul too empty without her by my side. I should have said the words. I should have explained that I’d never felt like this about anyone before, and I was certain I never could about anyone else.

She’d etched herself so thoroughly into my heart, I’d never be the same again.

I loved Esme Stryker with every fiber of my being.

I was supposed to be at my latest project house, but I couldn’t force myself to climb out of bed. I couldn’t face the world. I couldn’t bear to survive the day here, in Epiphany, knowing she was still in Calypso Caribella.

She’d told me to go. Gabriel had told me to go.

The only thing I could do was go.

Yet it felt like the worst mistake I’d made yet.

THIRTY-FOUR

ESME

It took me two days of fear and self-pity before I told Gabriel he had to leave. I locked my doors and refused to let him in. I didn’t go out, either, even though I got really stir crazy.

After another two days, I had a nice chat with Layana on the phone, where I promised to do all the vitamins, all the doctor’s visits, and that I’d call them if there was any kind of problem, no matter how small. They finally left. And the next day, I got a heartfelt text from her along with a picture from their honeymoon, where Gabriel was smiling.

I was doing the right thing.

But returning to my life felt like dragging my limp body through a hot swamp of garbage.

There was no good reason to feel so terrible. I had done hard things alone before, and I was getting exactly what I wanted.

---