Page 60 of Forking the Billionaire

I’d just lied to my best friend. Apparently I was on a bender of self-destruction today.

Something was seriously wrong with me. Maybe I was wrong about Jules being gone all night. Maybe she had sneaked in, bashed me on the head with a lamp, and knocked a few screws loose before disappearing into the night once more.

Gabriel’s expression softened. He clapped my shoulder. “She’ll get over it.”

I nodded and followed Gabriel back toward the group.

It didn’t matter how soft Esme’s cheeks felt in my palms. It didn’t matter that kissing her made me feel more alive than I’d ever felt. It didn’t matter how ferociously she’d kissed me back, how hard she’d clung to me in the water.

None of it could mean anything.

Nothing could ever happen with Esme. Nothing else, at least.

Esme would get over it.

Was that what I wanted? Did I want her to get over our kiss, like it meant nothing? Could I?

The right thing to do was apologize to her. I needed to fix my mistake.

I swam through the group, trying to get closer to her. But for every foot I swam in her direction, she swam two feet away, putting more bodies between us.

Finally she sidled up to Ziggy, and every time I tried to catch her eye, she averted her gaze.

I’d fucked up so badly, she refused to look at me. That hit hard. But I couldn’t blame her.

I gave up on pursuing her for the rest of the expedition, taking her lead and pretending everything was fine, like my entire world hadn’t just been thrown upside down, like I could stop imagining what would have happened if Gabriel hadn’t interrupted.

I’d beenthis closeto pulling the triangles of her bikini to the side and touching the small, pebbled nipples that she’d pressed against my chest. I’d beenthis closeto pushing just how far over the line she’d let me take her.

I had to forget about all of it.

I had to pretend it didn’t happen.

Eventually Ziggy led the group back to the shore. I followed along, leaving Esme alone. I participated in meaningless conversations with people I barely knew, but it was difficult to listen. It wasn’t any easier to focus on what Gabriel or Oscar said, either.

I needed a few shots of tequila, a few hours on a surfboard, and a night of dreamless sleep. Then tomorrow, maybe I’d have my shit together. Maybe tomorrow I could be the friend I needed to be, the friend that I should have been today.

When we returned to the resort, I spotted Esme talking to Gabriel. She gestured over her shoulder with her thumb, and turned her head like she was about to go.

Was she skipping out on the evening because of me? I hoped not.

I flexed my hands in the still-damp pockets of my trunks and forced myself to look away. The last thing I should do is insert myself in their conversation. I turned my back to them, joining the small circle of people chatting there.

Morgan leaned into Oscar’s side. She said, “I’m pretty sure we burned enough calories for two days on the water.”

He wrapped his arm around her and looked down adoringly. Before Morgan, I wasn’t sure Oscar could do anything “adoringly.” Ever since he was a kid, he more typically scowled, even at puppies.

Juno said, “Does that mean you’re ready for a break?”

Morgan nodded.

“We can all take a break, meet back up for dinner?” Layana said.

“Sounds great,” Morgan told her. “I’m taking a nap.”

“I’m taking all the time I can to soak up the sun. It’s the beach for me,” Juno said.

I noted then that Chester, who was typically attached to Juno’s side, wasn’t anywhere around. And now that I was thinking about it, I wasn’t sure I’d seen him all day.

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