Page 85 of The Masks She Wore

?“No,” I replied, hushing my voice. “No, I’ll get to your house early, but don’t text me. This phone’s been hacked, I’m getting a new one.”

?“Damn, okay, not a problem, just get here early then,” she repeated back to me.

?“Okay,” I said with a slight smile. “Okay, yeah, I’ll see you there.” I hung up and turned to face the door, straining my ears to see where he was.

?I couldn’t hear anything.

?I leaned my forehead against the door and closed my eyes. “Just…just focus,” I told myself, placing a hand flat against the door. “Focus.” I couldn’t very well be angry at Zo for being irritated. I didn’t even know what they actually did for a living, just that they had done some drug deal with some Russian. That’s all I knew. They were dangerous people, Malachi was their boss, and here I was, being sadistically initiated into their life by a crazy person who I let fuck me.

?A man I was fucking addicted to at this point.

?I couldn’t blame her for being defensive, but she didn’t have to be a cunt either.

?I just needed to go out there and listen. How else will I find out the truth about my life if I don’t put up with them anyway?

?I stepped back and rolled my shoulders, wincing at the pain it caused. With a breath, I finally opened the door and found Jack standing yards away, hands in his pockets, his eyes locked directly on mine.

?I swallowed and lifted my chin as I stepped out of the bathroom. “You owe me a new door.”

?“You’re moving in with me, so it doesn’t matter,” he stated evenly.

?I scoffed and shook my head. “No, I’m not.”

?“If that’s what you’d like to believe, then fine,” he shrugged.

?I stalked across the room, brushing by him. “I’m not moving in with you, Jack.”

?Surprisingly enough, he allowed me by. “Because I fucked Zo?”

?I opened my closet door. “Because you let me humiliate myself in front of both of you,” I replied, searching through my clothes. “That was my fault though. I got too attached too fast, taking your word as law,” I went on, pulling at the end of a black dress, inspecting it, only to let it fall back. “I should have taken it for what it was.”

?“And what is that, Rae?” he asked, standing in my closet doorway, his tone threatening.

?I shrugged. “Just the word of a psychopath.”

?“No, Rae, I mean the word. What word did I say that made you shift into this?”

?I looked over to him. He took up the entire space of the doorway. He was still, cold. Far different than the man who fucked me for a week, who bathed me every night, took care of me. “You said you’d protect me. That I was important.” I turned back to my clothes. “I allowed myself to believe that it went deeper than physical. You will protect mephysicallyfrom any outside threat that isn’t you. Anything outside of that is free game.”

?“I can’t protect you from humiliating yourself, Princess.”

?God, there was no emotion to his voice at all. It was eerie how easily he was able to shut himself off like that. And here I was wishing I could do the same.

?How long had he trained to make that a possibility? Could I learn it in a few minutes? Was that even possible?

?I nodded, turning to face him completely, tears welling in my eyes. “You could have warned me that you had a partner you fucked like you fuck me. I get that it’s not the same for men. You people don’t see women as anything more than toys to fuck and throw away. You don’t getattached, but ustoys, we get attached, Jack. You drained me ofeverything. Everything. You took it all from me, every ounce of emotion I had, every word, every…feeling,” I spat, the tears spilling over.

?I wiped at them angrily and straightened again, trying to keep my expression hard. “You were saying all of these things that, rationally, I should have known they were just words. I justmet you, fuck, I’m fucking insane, aren’t I? Letting you get into my head that fucking quickly? Absolutely delusional.”

?I released a shuddering breath, turning away from him, my hands shaking. “Oh my God, I’m sick.” I rubbed my eyes fiercely, trying to reel in my own control.

?After a second, I inhaled deeply and turned back to him. “I get the rules, I understand them. You’ve ‘Claimed me’,” I said, adding the air quotes, watching as his eyes dried, his jaw feathering, “so that means I’m yours to play with until you kill me. Yours to humiliate, yours to use, yours to flaunt until I’m all used up. Until you find someone else better to Claim. I can force myself to accept that, Hell, maybeCharlotte Alascer would have accepted that without fight. Maybe she’s weaker than I am. So, I will be submissive, and I will do what you say, what you want, and I will let it all happen according to you, but I get my own life too.”

?He watched me for a long time, and I half wondered if he could hear how fast my heart was racing. “Good,” he finally said, and turned on his heel. “If you’re getting dressed, do it quickly so we can talk. Zo and I have an assignment this afternoon.”

?Rage filled me at his lack of response. I wasn’t sure what I truly expected, but I had wanted something more than that. I wanted to fight. I wanted him to snap. To argue. To tell me that Iwasdelusional, but he picked me anyway. I needed him to tell me that thiswastemporary so that I could stop thinking that it was anything else. I neededsomething.

?“Yeah,” I nodded, turning back to my clothes, exhausted and far too emotional. “Just another Max I let into my life, this is just fucking perfect.” What was wrong with me? I should go see a therapist. But then what would I say? ‘Hey, I let this criminal into my life thinking it’d be a good release, and here I am, facing the consequences of my own actions’. That would go over well.

---