I nodded and climbed into the driver’s seat before turning the vehicle around and heading for the barn. When we arrived, Way took off with Indigo toward the farther pastures while I headed up to the apartment.
Tully had Lellie on one hip while he scrambled eggs with his free hand. He was shirtless and sleepy-faced. His hair stuck up on one side, and his voice was scratchy as he murmured to her about breakfast.
My heart took a wild detour toward fantasies of domestic bliss for a split second until I reined it in.
“Mornin’,” I called. “Thanks for getting her up.”
His eyes met mine but then skittered away as he made a sound of acknowledgment. I walked over and took her out of his arms. “You ready to get dressed while Tully finishes up?”
She tucked her head against my chest and melted my heart. I gave her a quick hug, then chuckled as she squirmed out of my hold and demanded to be put down. Jo Blake said she’d neverseen a child so determined to stand on her own two feet at this age. “Stubborn,” she’d said. “Like her father.”
I’d dismissed it at the time, but maybe she was right.
Maybe Silas was, too.
Once Lellie was dressed, I brought her to the breakfast table, but as we ate, the silence between Tully and me grew excruciating. I considered ways to break the tension, but I couldn’t come up with anything that wasn’t offensive or ridiculous. He all but ignored me, speaking happily to Lellie and only engaging with me when absolutely necessary.
I scrambled for a way to get us all out of this. “I’m taking Lellie to Three Daughters for a hike. Would you like to come?”
Maybe if we could get away from the ranch, get outside in the summer sun, and move our bodies, we’d find a way to get past this awkward discomfort. And maybe I could ask Tully’s advice about what Silas and I had discussed.
Tully cleared his throat and refused to meet my eyes. “Thanks for including me, but I have a couple of important calls and a ton of work to catch up on. Maybe you can enjoy the day together, just the two of you.”
His rejection of my invitation stung, but I understood. Why would he want to spend the day with someone who ran hot and cold like a temperamental faucet?
After we finished eating and cleaning up, I packed up enough snacks, drinks, and supplies for an army before moving Lellie’s car seat from Tully’s rental to my SUV.
I headed into town first to Lake Sports, where I’d seen a hiking backpack that Lellie could ride in.
Jackson Painter greeted me as soon as I walked in. “Hey, Dev, who’s this?” His smile was wide for Lellie. I introduced her by name, avoiding explaining that she was my daughter. I didn’t want to have to explain the situation or deal with futurequestions about her when… or, okay,if… she didn’t end up staying with me.
“I came for one of those hiking backpacks I can put her in. We’re going to do that flattish trail at the base of Maude unless you have a different suggestion.”
He directed me toward the right side of the store. “No, that’s perfect. It’s only a mile to Newton Lake, and you can picnic there. Show her how to skip rocks.”
“She’s not quite sixteen months,” I told him, as though that number would have meant a damn thing to me even a few short weeks ago. “More likely to eat rocks than skip them.”
Considering her size again, he wrinkled his nose, then nodded. “Fair point. Maybe show her howyouskip rocks and let her plonk them in the water.”
When I pulled down the backpack to check it out, Jackson squatted down to distract Lellie. He was all charm and sweet smiles.
“You’re good with her,” I observed. “Did you and Lake ever think about having kids?”
Jackson and his husband had been together a while, and I’d always admired their relationship.
“We’re in the process of trying to adopt,” he said, smiling back at Lellie as she waved around a colorful set of webbing straps she’d pulled off a nearby rack. “It’s not easy.”
We continued talking as I tried on the backpack and decided to buy it. It wasn’t until I was halfway down the highway toward Three Daughters that I put two and two together and considered that Jackson and Lake could be potential parents for Lellie. I admired both men and knew them to be kind and loving people, dedicated to their business and the town of Majestic. They were generous, attentive, and warm. I couldn’t imagine anyone better suited to becoming parents once I started thinking about it.
But when I made the logical leap between realizing they’d be great parents and imagining myself handing Lellie over to them, my gut roiled.
I pulled into the small parking area by the trailhead and rearranged the necessary supplies into the pockets of the backpack before pulling Lellie out of her car seat and trying to load her into the pack.
She heartily rejected the offer.
We started out with me carrying an empty backpack while Lellie toddled at her usual drunken-sailor pace down the trail.
The day was beautiful, warm and sunny without any humidity. There were wildflowers along the edges of the trail and Lellie even noticed a brightly colored butterfly. Several other visitors shared the trail with us as we made our way toward the lake. Lellie’s legs tired fairly quickly, and she allowed me to put her in the backpack so we could pick up the pace. Thankfully, the little baggie of apple slices I’d brought kept her busy long enough to get used to being in the pack.