What did that look mean? Were they considering offering to take Lellie themselves? If so… how would I feel about that?
I knew Silas and Way were the real deal. They were passionately in love with each other and dedicated to Way’s family and our friends. They would have tons of support, and Lellie would grow up here on the ranch surrounded by love and adventure. Any child of theirs would be incredibly lucky.
I couldn’t deny that a sliver of unease curled through my gut at the idea of them raising her, though. Of having to give her up while still having her so close. Of trusting anyone else to raise her.
I’d have to get over that because I couldn’t have it both ways, but I decided to let it be for now. That might not have been what their look was about, anyway. Deciding to raise a child wasn’t something you did on a whim or with a silent look.
“I need to get back to her,” I said. “But you’ll ask Jo about watching Lellie?”
“Of course,” Way agreed.
I let out a breath. “Thank you. All of you.”
When I turned to leave, Silas reached for my arm to stop me. “Don’t do anything rash,” he blurted.
“Like what?”
“Like… give her up without talking to the rest of us. Let us help you through this, Dev. Don’t make any important decisions in a vacuum. Okay?”
Maybe he did want her. Maybe he just needed time to discuss it with Way. If that was the case, it suddenly seemed like taking my time to consider things was a good idea. Not rushing such an important decision would be the prudent choice.
“Okay.”
Silas let out a breath and gave me another hug before slapping my back and shoving me toward the door. “Go get your girl. And don’t think I’m done asking you about that hottie who brought her.”
Way sputtered. “Excuse me? Hottie? What the fuck?”
Silas waved his hand over his shoulder. “Not as hot as you, sweetheart. Obviously. I just mean there’s obviously some kind of tension between Dev and hisattorneyfriend… and I’d like to hear that story at some point.”
“No story,” I said, lying through my teeth.
Silas knew me all too well. “Sure, babe. And I’ll believe you when you can say that without turning the color of an overripe tomato. Which, incidentally, is the same color Tully turned when I asked him about you.”
I flipped him the bird as I headed out the door.
After riding back to the barn, I untacked Trigger and pampered him for a bit before turning him out for the night with the other personal stock. Someone had already filled hay nets and ensured there was clean water for everyone, which meant someone else must have taught Indigo how to do the afternoon feed.
Just when I was ready to head upstairs to the apartment, lecturing myself about the need to apologize to Tully for disappearing like I had, I heard Lellie’s little giggle come from around the corner of the barn. I followed the sound and found her and Tully sitting in the grass with a pile of dandelions between them and several yellow blooms shoved in Tully’s hair. He was making a funny face at her as he pretended to wonder what she was laughing about.
The sun shone down from a deep blue sky, and the gentle scent of horse, hay, and new plant growth floated on the warm breeze. I stood and watched them for a few moments before Lellie noticed me. Her entire face lit up, and she made a happy noise.
“Dah!”
ELEVEN
TULLY
The look on Dev’s face when Lellie attempted to say his name could only be described as shock. I knew her well enough to know she was attempting to say “Dev” because she didn’t know him as anything other than that, but the way she said it could definitely be interpreted as a toddler’s attempt at saying “Dada.”
I quickly tried to ease the tension. “That’s right. Dev’s here. Maybe Dev needs some flowers, too.”
“Dah!” she said, grabbing a handful of flowers in her fat fist and standing up to approach him. By the time she reached Dev, the flowers were more of a yellow mash, but he received them as if they were the Crown Jewels.
“Thank you, sweetheart. What beautiful buttercups. Do you know these flowers have the same name as the horse you met yesterday? Her name is Buttercup, too.”
She ran back and threw herself down with abandon. Dev followed, lowering himself carefully to the ground beside me. I tried not to appreciate the intoxicating combination of horse and clean sweat coming from him, but it was nearly impossible.
He began to tie the flowers together into a chain, narrating the process to Lellie, who pranced around us, babbling and pulling at random clumps of grass. When he finished thechain, Dev leaned over and lowered his voice. “I’m sorry I left earlier without asking you to watch her. It was rude and presumptuous.”