Page 25 of Love Finds Home

Chapter 9

Elle

The van has beenunloaded, we took a break to eat, and now Jorge is in the studio with me unpacking everything and putting it in its place. We work silently for a while, but I know it’s coming. I’ve just set up my paints when I look at him. He’s staring at me, like he’s trying to decide how to start.

He blows out a breath and I know my time is up.

“That is a fine piece of meat,” he begins.

“Jorge, everybody’s a piece of meat to you,” I remind him.

“Yeah, but he’s like prime rib perfectly cooked with a side of au jus. And a big…potato.”

“We just ate. Why does everything have to remind you of food?”

“I’m a man, baby girl.”

“Are you?” I smirk at him.

“Fuck you,” he laughs.

I rub my hands over my face, knowing that I have to talk about this with someone and I can’t do it with the girls. They’d start planning a fucking wedding.

“J, I don’t know what to do,” I admit.

“What do you mean, you don’t know what to do? Do about what?”

I watch as he sets up an easel on the floor in front of the window just how I like it before I say anything.

“I don’t know. I don’t know what’s going on. I feel like I’m lost.”

“Because you had a breakup with some guy you didn’t even really like?”

“No, it’s more than that. I just feel like I’m failing at life.”

“Why do you feel that way? You have friends, a successful art studio and career. Why would you feel like you’re failing?”

“I guess I always thought at this point in my life, I’d have found somebody that wanted to be with me for me. Not for my family connections. Not for my money. And it just seems like everybody wants to use me.”

“I think Chelsea would be very upset to hear you say that. I’m a little hurt to hear you say that.”

“Jorge, no. I know I have you two and that you both love me for me, but unless you want to settle down and have kids with me, it’s not the same.”

He walks over to me, pulling me into his arms.

“I know what you’re trying to say, and I still call bullshit. You’re a strong woman, and when the time is right, if settling down is what you want, it’ll happen with who it’s supposed to happen with. But you know you can’t force it. And since when did you decide you wanted kids?”

I roll my eyes at him. “I don’t know that I’ve decided, per se, but I would like to know the option is there for me before my eggs shrivel up and die, you know? That’s all.”

“Maybe you’ll find that here. Removed from your name—the family one and the famous artist one. And I know you’ve already made friends here, because you can’t help it. And they can’t help it either. You’re easy to love, Elle. Really.”

“I have made friends, but I feel like they’re Tiny’s friends and they just put up with me.”

“Fuck that noise. I don’t know how many times I have to tell you this. If people don’t like you, they wouldn’t hang around you. Or invite you to things. Or have drunken nights in with you.”

“Maybe.” I shrug my shoulders. “I feel like I might have failed somewhere. Like at some point in my life, I was a bad person and this is karma here to finally collect her due. I just don’t know what I might have done to earn it.”

Jorge lifts my chin to look into his eyes. “Baby girl, I love you, but this mood of yours. Does it have anything to do with the dead flowers?”

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