Page 98 of When in December

“You came to the party with your friends who were always awful to you at school, and yet you were always smiling for some reason. I could never figure out what you could be smiling about. Whose life is so good that they’re always happy, right?”

“I wasn’t always happy.”

“Then, why the fuck were you smiling?”

I shrugged. “Because I was always told to. ‘Smile to make everyone else wonder why you’re smiling,’ Mom used to say. As if that would help me make more friends. Better friends. It didn’t, but at the time, I was willing to try just about anything. So, I did.”

“And was smiling and pretending to be happy easier?” he asked.

“Sometimes.” Other times, it’d felt like my smile was slowly eating me away from the inside out.

“Yeah, I didn’t have that advice.”

“Clearly.”

Aaron breathed a sharp laugh. “Yet, I’ll admit your smile sure made me feel better. Especially that night at the party.”

“It wasn’t a big deal.”

“It was though, Poppy. It was a big deal. You made that night bearable for me. You were the only one who stuck around, and years later, I didn’t recognize you, and you didn’t say anything.”

I waited for it. I waited for him to finally get angry and kick me out.

But he didn’t do that. Instead, he took a step forward. I took a step back until my back was flush against the bookcase.

“And when I figured it out, for some reason, there was only one thing I thought.”

I swallowed, feeling the pressure from the lack of space between us. “What?”

“I regretted not kissing you again sooner.”

He didn’t pause now before he kissed me again.

It wasn’t like our last kiss, hesitant and brushing enough that it could’ve been an accident. This kiss was deliberate. It was hot. It was us. I breathed and bent into him, unable to help myself. Neither could he. His hands felt as if they molded to my body, his mouth lavishing me.

I gasped, angling my chin back until my head leaned against a shelf and I was able to stare up at him.

“What?”

“Just making sure this isn’t a body-snatchers situation,” I said softly before shaking my head again. “We need to stop.”

“Why?”

“Finding out—it doesn’t change anything here, Aaron.”

“It changes everything.” He stood there in the silence, given the light snow falling outside could be heard if you listened close enough.

“You’re being dramatic.”

“I am?” he asked.

“Uh-huh,” I said. “You might be the most dramatic man I’ve ever met in my entire life. Listen to me.”

“I’m listening.”

“We’re still exactly where we are. Let’s leave all this at that. We have all of, what? Five days left? We made it. Congratulations to us. Let’s just be happy with what we managedhere.” I looked around at the nearly perfect home I managed create here. “We can pause. Then neither of us will have to worry about ruining any of this.”

“Who says anything about ruining?” He pushed the shoulder of my dress down with a smirk. “I think that us together do the exact opposite of ruining.”

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