Page 40 of His Secret

“Okay.”

I lean over her shoulder and kiss her temple but she just stares down at the bowl of cracked eggs.

I try not to think about her dad coming to visit, because it only makes me mad. If he’s coming, I don’t doubt he’ll send information back to my own father. I don’t need them spying on us. But those two have been friends for decades, and they care too much about what Charlotte and I have going on.

In the office, I go straight to my desk to get to work, but when I look up, I see Matías strutting past my window and all thoughts of work fly out of my head.

He stands in the middle of the room, talking to someone. He smiles and slips one hand in his pocket. My eyes trace every part of him, wanting to know what he looks like under the clothes. I wonder how his body looks now with the changes age and the gym have made.

Then I remember what he said at the restaurant. He wants me in a collar. On a leash.A leash?!He wants to use a riding crop. He wants to use me.

My stomach flips and my dick twitches.

Don’t think about this now.

In college, he was definitely more experienced than Iwas. He did teach me things. He had to take the lead several times, so him being in control now isn’t too surprising. I would’ve never thought of him in this kinky sort of way. When we had sex, we just did what felt good. We were figuring things out about each other. Learning what the other person liked. Now he knows. He’s definitely still more experienced than I am. He could teach me even more now.

I shake my head. This isn’t something I should be imagining, so I put my head down and get to work.

I manage to avoid a face-to-face encounter with him while at work. I send him two work-related emails, and then I go home at the end of the day.

But even at home, there are several times throughout the evening where I zone out and imagine what it would be like to be with Matías in the way he mentioned. To be with him in any way.

He’s the only man I’ve ever had sex with, and while we started off slow back then, we got to know each other in ways I never thought would happen for me. And now he’s on a whole other level, and I can’t help but be bothered by the fact that, for the last eight years, I’ve been on a playing field for a sport I have no interest in. I can’t learn, advance, or grow into myself when I’m doing something I couldn’t care less about.

It’s hard not to wonderwhat if.

The Past

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

MATÍAS

It’sthe middle of November, and we’re having our first official date. Well, at least that’s how we’re referring to it. We’ve had several nights alone here in my room, and we’ve been to a couple of parties, but we haven’t had what felt like a date.

We go to a movie, and it’s safe because college guys go to movies together all the time. It doesn’t outwardly look like we’re a couple. As long as we don’t hold hands, kiss, or stare longingly into each other’s eyes, then Adrian’s secret is safe.

But in the back of the dark theater, he rubs his leg against mine and I grin. His fingers dance over my thigh at the darkest moments in the movie and my pulse races.

By the time the movie is over, we’re both starving, so we stop by Nicola’s pizza parlor, and decide to eat inside.

The air is a biting thirty-nine degrees in windy conditions, so the warmth of the restaurant is inviting. We sit at a booth in the back, blowing our breath into our hands to warm them up.

We order a large pizza and some drinks, but before it’s even out, Adrian’s roommates show up.

“Hey!” Tyrell says, spotting us as soon as he walks in.

“Did y’all already order?” Frankie asks, scooting in next to Adrian.

“We did. What’re y’all up to?” he questions.

Tyrell sits next to me. “Just came to pick up some pizza before we head to this party. You guys wanna come?”

I would rather die, I think to myself. Tonight is our date night, which will hopefully be ending in us having sex for the first time, so I definitely don’t want to go to a party. I try to get the message across with my eyes.

“Whose party?” Adrian asks.

“Thatcher’s.”

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