Page 2 of Underneath the Mask

More silence. He’s really starting to piss me off, so I slam his face into the concrete without warning.

“What the fuck was that for?” He complains once he recovers.

“You were annoying me. I asked a question, and you failed to answer.” I reply.

“This is the last time I’m going to ask. Have I been clear? Do you understand what will happen if I ever see you again?”

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1.Goldiloxed- To be the perfect amount. Not too hot, and not too cold. To be just right.

two

Admired

Amanda

I’m paralyzed with fear, stopped dead in my tracks and standing smack dab in the middle of the alley. Everything about me is enticing and vulnerable. The perfect victim, all alone in the dark, and still a block from the safety of home. Although, my audience doesn’t know that yet. My brain tries desperately to unstick my frozen body.Run, Amanda. We can make it. We have to get somewhere safe.My muscles groan in response, protesting my brain’s commands.We are losing precious seconds.This time when I try to take a step forward, my legs shake like jello. They don’t have much time to malfunction. A rock skids across the concrete behind me with a loud scrape. Out of the corner of my eye, a shape springs to life, and so do my feet. They carry me swiftly across the shadow streaked sidewalk, toward the safety of home. I don’t stop until I’m clambering up the front steps and through the heavy mahogany door. When my hand slides over the cool metal lock, turning the tumbler over behind me, I take a deep breath and scramble across the dark hallway and into the kitchen. The French doorsleading out to the wood deck are locked and the blinds are drawn closed. I don’t turn on any lights. If they know where I live, or if they followed me home, whoever they are—I don’t want them to know that I’m here. Alone. I slip across the smooth wood planks on the kitchen floor. My fingers land against the cool marble countertops and slide a few inches lower to pull the drawer handle open. I don’t dare glance down into the knife drawer without a quick sweep over the dimly lit kitchen. Certain I am safe and alone, I look down in search of the largest knife I can find. My eyes scan the contents of the drawer frantically as my fingers carefully rummage through it. They are just about to wrap around a gleaming silver handle when the lights flip on above me. I clutch the knife greedily, jump, then spin around, letting out a high-pitched scream in hopes someone might hear me.

“Hey, I’m sorry I scared you. It’s just me. I came home early. Christ, Amanda, I think you screamed so loud the neighbors are going to come over and ask if everything is okay.” My boyfriend says, as he crosses the room to comfort me.

“Jesus. Fuck. Goddamnit, you scared me,” I confess, my heart still thundering in my chest and my fingers wrapped around the knife so tightly, my knuckles are turning white.

Feeling self conscious and stupid, I set the knife down slowly on the countertop as I breathe a sigh of relief. Before I can do anything else, he’s pulling me protectively into his embrace. “What has you so jumpy and worked up?” He asks me as he drags his thumb across my jaw, then plants a tender kiss against my forehead. His lips calming all of my nerves, that burn like fire, screeching, we are still in danger.

I close my eyes, leaning into him, inhaling deeply. His spicy warm sandalwood and leather scent washes over my senses, calming me instantly as my racing heartbeat slows. His warm, buttery voice is rasping in my ear as he apologizes. “I didn’tmean to freak you out. I was upstairs working on reviewing the setup for the art gallery show later this month, and I thought I heard the front door slam. Before I came downstairs to get dinner started, I turned the shower on for you and then came down to get dinner started.” He runs his big, strong hands over my arms.

I stutter for a moment, struggling to find the words I need. “I think someone was following.” My confession leaves my eyes brimming with tears as the reality sets in.

“Did you see someone?” He asks, suddenly even more serious, a look of concern contorting his face.

“Not exactly.” I reply. “I heard a sound down the alley, and I saw a giant human shaped shadow.”

“A giant shadow?” He questions, quipping his brow at me.

“I know it sounds unbelievable, right?” I say, feeling childish.

“No baby. I believe you, but you know it probably was just an animal or the wind blowing stuff around. If it will make you feel better and you’ll let me, I can pick you up and drive you home from now on.” He offers in a reassuring tone.

“No, you’re probably right, but what if it wasn’t?” I ask, looking up into his eyes, searching for some sort of reassurance.

“Let’s do this. We can call the police. I’m sure they can send an officer out to poke around. I’ll call it in and you can go grab a shower while we wait. You know their response time for something like this might be a little on the long side, but I think it will help you feel better. You have the next two days off. Skip the volunteer hours at the clinic tomorrow and get some extra rest. They will be just fine without you this week.” I can’t help it. Something about the way he rationalizes the entire situation makes me feel at ease. He’s right, my hours have been taking a toll on me and the clinic will function just fine without me tomorrow.

I shiver. I know it’s from the adrenaline, and my body decompressing, but my sweet boyfriend mistakes my reaction for having an actual chill.

“Go on. You’re shivering Amanda. Next time call me, or charge a ride to my account. I don’t need you walking home covered in sweat from the gym all the time and catching a cold.” He gives me one more big bear hug. Kisses my cheek and says, “Take your time and when you come back down, I’ll have a nice big bowl of soup waiting for you.”

He places the knife back in the drawer, shaking his head. “This isn’t the kind of knife you cut vegetables with. You stay out of my cutlery and I’ll keep supporting your reading habit. Good deal?”

I crack a smile at him. The warmth of a nice hot shower is more than appealing. After all, it was probably nothing more than an alley cat getting into the trash.It was much too large to be a cat. It was a man. Don’t be stupid.The intrusive thoughts in my head push back against the false narrative I’m using to mask my true emotions. Fear pulses its way through my body once more, gripping my thoughts and forcing me to picture the shadow covered dark outline of a man’s body.

I glance over my shoulder at my perfect boyfriend. He’s laying out vegetables for chopping and slicing. Deciding to take his advice, I slink off to the shower with all the best intentions of relaxation.

In the shower, I try not to think about everything that happened on my way home tonight. I probably shouldn’t have agreed to calling the police. It feels silly to have gotten so worked up. The warm water runs over my face and I breathe in the steam. Droplets beat down on my skin in a soothing rhythm as I close my eyes, allowing the water to melt my anxiety away. This is exactly what I needed after a long day at work. I shut the water off and grab my towel. In my closet I pull a comfy pair of sweatpants from the drawer and rip an oversized Halloweenthemed T-shirt from a hanger. When I'm dressed, I check to make sure my reading tablet is charged and eye the stack of paperbacks on the nightstand. I could spend tomorrow curled up with something from my pile.

When I arrive back downstairs, I already feel better. There are voices coming from the entryway and I realize there are two police officers standing in the foyer.

“Hey, are you Amanda?” The older officer with speckled gray hair and a mustache asks when he notices me on the stairs.

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