Page 111 of The Harbinger

I didn’t belong.

The gnawing sense of inadequacy hung heavy in my gut like a bloated corpse, refusing to be ignored.

I searched the bathroom, my eyes darting from one corner to another, ensuring I was alone. The hunger pangs gnawed at my insides, a constant reminder of my emptiness.

With trembling hands, I tore a piece of cardboard from the hair tie box and rolled it into a tube, leaving a hollow center.

Before I could talk myself out of it, I bent over the snowy white line.

Inhaling the cocaine was like breathing in death, unlike the powder I’d tried for Sacha. This burned through my sinuses and coated my throat in a numbing chill, but the rush it brought was worth the discomfort. The shaking in my hands subsided, and my mind soared with a weightlessness that drowned out my self-loathing thoughts. As I stared at my reflection in the mirror, a smile crept onto my lips, a momentary reprieve from the darkness that had settled in my soul.

This was what I needed.

I sighed, a burst of energy coursing through my veins as I wiped up the remaining powder and rubbed it against my gums. They numbed on contact, and I slumped onto the bench, my shoulders lowering as the tension left my fingertips. A laugh fell from my lips, as did my worries, my now dry hair falling in my face.

If life would stay like this, a pleasant moment of no worries and utter bliss, I may not complain about the man who ripped my heart out like a sacrifice.

The room swirled with a warm glow as I stared at my reflection in the mirror, my pupils swallowing my gray irises as the sweet numbness of the powder coursed through my veins. A sudden crack of thunder boomed through the house, rattling the windows and causing the lights to flicker. The buzzing thrill that had been feeding my high ignored the fear that would have normally gripped me in such a situation.

I steadied myself against the wall, the cool plaster smooth against my palm as I shuffled into my room. The pain in my knees was no longer a thought, consumed by the electric current surging through my body.

Thump.

Tha-thump.

My heart pummeled my ribcage as I entered my room and collapsed onto my bed. The soft comforter and mattress engulfed me like pillowed arms, its comfort warming my back and sore muscles. Sacha’s darkness washed away from me, except for his mark on my chest I couldn’t seem to wipe away.

A distant rumble echoed, shaking the windows in their frames. The sound rolled over me like a freight train, shaking the room with its power. My worries and fears melted to the floor, dripping from my toes and soaking into the mattress as if they rotted away from my flesh.

I sighed, plopped my head into the pillow as I stared at the fan spinning against the ceiling. The clothes on my body tightened, suffocating, and overwhelming. Heat flashed across my skin, sweat formed on my brow.

I rolled off my bed, shucking my shirt over my head, then tossed my pants to the floor. Collapsing again onto the cool sheets that made up my expensive bed, I star-fished across the expanse, my hands and feet never touching the edges. I closed my eyes, my mind following the thick thrumming veins in my body, pulsing with life like an electrical current that started from my toes.

Energy lost to me reemerged with a surge so powerful it expelled through my hands in wondrous shakes. The Earth swelled with clarity as my hands roamed over the lines that powered through me, my pulse hard in my throat. The storm outside had intensified, the rain now pelting the windows like tiny pebbles.

How was my mind so numb to the pain, yet my body zinged with every touch my fingertips whispered against?

A second set of hands, warm and firm, traced up my body, sending shivers wracking through my bones. I closed my eyes, gasped for air as the phantom hands moved up my calves, over my knees, and settled on my thighs.

The pressure built with each passing moment, digging into my inner muscles like a vice, the touch gripping every fiber of my being.

Was this real or merely a product of my drugged mind?

A gentle kiss pressed down on my center, and I gasped, the tip of a tongue darting across my clit. I bucked my hips, my hands cupping my breasts as I pinched my nipples, giving in to whatever this force desired.

Pressure dug into my thighs, forcing my legs apart as the mouth ravished my body, building a taut tension in my belly, bringing me to the precipice with unmistakable eagerness.

Shoulders nudged my thighs as the hands readjusted.

It’s real.

The heat in my belly, the wetness between my legs…

My eyes flew open and landed on the blond-styled hair puddled between my legs, moving in time with the tongue lapping at my clit. Sleeves pressed up to the elbows revealed demonic tattooed arms wrapped around my thighs, trapping my legs.

It was him.

“Sacha,” I whimpered as the orgasm ripped through my body, clenching my abdominal muscles, my hands dipping into his hair to hold his mouth tight to me.

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