Page 127 of Corrupting Ivy

I wasn’t used to someone taking care of me, being thoughtful, and taking my needs into consideration. Which was why it was so hard for me to accept his gifts before, making me appear ungrateful.

But I wasn’t. I was more than grateful. I just didn’t know how to accept it all.

I took the bag from his hands and smiled. “Thank you, Randall.”

Dressing in the sweats and t-shirt, I slipped my shoes on, and met him at the door.

“Are you hungry? You didn’t eat.”

I shook my head.

There was no way I could eat with everything on my mind. I put my hand on his and glanced up at him, his brown eyes soft and gentle.

“Randall, where do we go from here?”

“Home. Preferably.” A small smile lifted his lips.

“I mean with us—you and me?”

He stepped forward and placed his hands on the sides of my neck, his thumbs tipping my chin up. “Where do you want this to go?”

“I…” I shook my head.

“I want us to be together, day and night, until we can no longer remember our own names. I told you before, you’ll want for nothing, and you’ll fear nothing. And I mean that. I failed you this time, but I won’t again.”

Wrapping my hands around his wrists, I inhaled his spicy scent. “You didn’t fail me. If you had, I’d be dead with no one around to mourn me.”

He brought hope into my world that no matter how bad it became, there was someone who wanted me. Who’d treat me right and use whatever means necessary to protect me. I’d never had that before.

“Let’s go home, Randall.”

He dipped down, his lips meeting mine in a sensual rhythm that had my legs quivering by the time he pulled away.

And that’s when I knew.

Two days later

The rain hadn’t stoppedsince we left Montana, since Randall said we were forever, and I secretly agreed. Once we arrived at home, the rain only got worse.

It was as though the skies cried for me—for us. They understood the anguish and torment this situation put us in as Randall shared his past, his present, and insisted I be his future.

I wanted that, more than anything, but I couldn’t find the words to express these feelings pounding against me like the rain beat against the windshield.

At one point, he must have noticed my torment and insisted I speak to Liz. Apparently, she’d been through something similar, and he thought maybe she’d be able to help me through it.

But I didn’t need to speak to anyone. I just needed the time to process, to lament. Not for the people who he killed, the men I wished dead millions of times over the course of my marriage, but for the unfinished business and things I wished I could’ve said. Only time could help me get over that.

I think he was concerned I’d leave. But I knew what I wanted and needed. I just wasn’t sure how to express those feelings to him.

So here I sat, two days later, staring at the rain, trying to find my words while Randall writhed in the unknown.

I’d gotten lost in the meadows, staying clear of the trees. I even sat at the bottom of the pool, watching the rain hammer against the surface as it penetrated the barrier of chlorinated water trying to reach me.

I’d held my breath, trying to find a way to tell him all the things that needed to be said until I steeled myself, and decided to do what I always did with him.

Throw caution to the wind and run full steam ahead towards him without a plan.

My love for him wasn’t in question. Though, if I was honest with myself, there was nothing he could do that would stop me from falling head over heels for him. Maybe that was what scared me the most.