Page 61 of Protecting Charity

My head throbbed, causing nausea to eat at my throat as I bounced in the trunk.

I knew something was wrong when Josh told me he was going to atone for his sins. The realization struck deep in the gut like a sucker punch, forcing the air from my lungs. Things made sense to me, and I understood where he had been all this time, just from one little saying.

When he kept babbling on about the gates of heaven and other things, I tuned out and tried putting much-needed space between us, but my heel stuck in the gravel. He gained on me in a flash and caught me off guard. I never expected him to bash my head into the car. My face itched as the blood trickled down and soaked into the carpet lining the trunk. My heart beat chaotically as I tried to wrap my head around this and the unknown. If I was honest with myself, it wasn't truly unknown what he had planned. It could only be one thing, and it was glaringly obvious. But why would Josh do this to me? After everything I had done for him. The life I had to live for him.

The tires kicked up rocks, hitting the car's undercarriage with pitched clanking until we came to a stop, and I rolled forward. His car door slammed, then a key was inserted into the trunk. I closed my eyes and laid my head back down, pretending to be out cold.

Josh grabbed my arms that I had cuffed behind my back. "Open your eyes, little sis. I know you're faking."

I opened my eyes and sneered. "You've got some fucking nerve, jackass." I lashed out, kicking my foot towards his chest. The blast of my heel to his chest knocked him back a foot or two before he came barreling back at me, throwing me to the dirt road. My lungs collapsed as I hit the ground, causing me to suck in gulps of air while I lay stunned on the gravel. I swiped out at him again as I coughed from the new oxygen, but I caught my dress on the trunk and tore as I tried to move. I didn't like the damn thing, anyway.

Josh hauled me over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, then walked me deep into the woods with a shovel in his hand, giving me time to think how this was going to go over.

"I tried doing this a different, easier way, Charity, but you kept messing it up."

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Put me down, Josh. Don't make me beat the shit out of you." I brewed with rage as each bump of his shoulder dug into my sore torso.

He dropped me down to the ground without a care for my well-being. A brittle stick cracked beneath me and dug into my side, causing me to bite my lip. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of crying out. Lightning shattered the night sky, threatening to bring the storm straight overhead.

"Josh, what is going on? Where have you been? I've been looking everywhere for you, going mad with worry."

I needed to hear it from him. He was a fucking lunatic if what he said was any hint of his previous whereabouts. If I was right, and I'm sure I was, I would break his legs so he could never walk again.

"I've been cleansing my soul, Charity, making it clean for our heavenly father."

My God, he has gone off the deep end. Josh was never a follower of Christ and balked anytime Mom made us read the bible. And now, he wanted to "get right with God"?

He took the metal shovel, struck the cold dirt, and started digging what I can only assume was a grave meant for me. I sucked in a sharp breath as I came to a painful realization. I always said that if there was one person who could take me out of this world, it would be Josh, and here he was, standing before me, ready to do just that. That meant I'd never go back to Max, Nico, and Luca and tell them how I felt. I'd never get to see their faces again; never make them angry or get them to laugh.

"It was you that ran me off the road, wasn't it? You shot at me like some thug doing a drive-by. Was that you in the parking garage too?" I already knew the answer. I could see the damage done to the car he was driving. Shit, I could have killed an innocent woman because of him. Well, Nora wasn't innocent, but clean in this. Thunder boomed through the woods, causing a rumble in my chest.

He beat the dirt with the shovel and threw the debris to the side before answering me. "At first, I tried calling the cops. I would rather you be sitting in prison for the sins you've committed than me have to bury you alone in the forest, Charity. I called the cops when you killed that woman, hoping they would get there in time and catch you in the act, but you got away."

I always wondered how the police knew about that. How they knew the exact time and place to be there and what to look for. My stomach churned, and I felt the need to vomit. My brother turned on me in the worst way. My very own Judas Iscariot. Not that I was anything close to Jesus, but fuck. My own brother? He wasn't betraying me for three pieces of silver, no, but for a golden ticket to a place he could only dream of stepping foot into.

"Josh," my voice cracked, and I hated it. "Why would you do this to me?"

The grave was getting deeper, and I needed to think of a way to get free from this.

"It is the only way for me to redeem myself. Father Kane said the only way to cleanse the soul of all its sins from the past is to rid the sins I gave life to in this world. The actions of others caused by my sins would continue to taint my soul if I allowed them to roam free."

I laughed hysterically because it was just insanity to be hearing this. "You are taking advice from a man named Kane? He's telling you to kill off your sins. Doesn't that seem a little fucking ironic, Josh?" Growing up in the Gibbons household had one requirement; know the bible and memorize it. Okay, there were several more rules than that, but that was one major thing that was metaphorically beat into us. Practically, everyone well knew Abel and Cain's story, even those who didn't go to church every Sunday.

"He doesn't recommend killing, but if it comes down to it, it's because God has commanded it."

"That's rich. You joined a fucking cult, Josh."

His voice boiled with anger. "It's not a cult. Father Kane's church is welcoming and accepts everyone."

I snorted. "I just bet he does. What the cops didn't get me, so you tried to put a bullet in my head?"

"No, Elias Hernandez had two opportunities to take care of you, and somehow you charmed your way out of both of them." He shoveled more dirt, the hole now up to his knees.

Tears burned my eyes as he left me speechless for the first time in a long while. I didn't need any more clarification. He was the one that told Elias about my involvement with Jose and Morgan. I moved my wrists around, fighting the panic rising in my throat, as I tried to free myself from the cuffs.

"When you walked away from that meeting in the store, I knew that was God telling me it was up to me now. I tried to make it quick and painless, one bullet to the head, but you moved. Then Nico interfered during the second attempt. I couldn't very well shoot you on the lawn. Not with that FBI agent watching and all. How did you manage to get all three of them to protect you, anyway?"

A rebel tear ran down my cheek, marking my face for him to see. I sniffed and blinked back the rest of the tears, trying to keep them at bay. How could I hear this? How could he besayingit as if killing his sister meant nothing to him? My chest grew heavy from betrayal. He was everything I had lived my life for up to this point.