Page 92 of Hero for the Holidays

So much more functional than her parents. And his.

What their parents had proved was that when there was conflict between the father and the mother he couldn’t continue to work together as a team. That when the romance between them ended they couldn’t continue to have a family.

That was why it was so important that she and Landry not...

It was important.

She picked an ice cube off the top of the bucket and crunched it, not caring that her dentist would yell at her because it was bad for her teeth.

A lot of things were bad for your teeth. And people did them anyway. She didn’t see why she couldn’t nervously crunch ice if necessary.

Then she walked down the hallway and went back into her room, and then to his by the connecting door.

He didn’t look at her when she came in, and she squinted.

He was doing that thing. That aloof thing that he did.

But at least it wasn’t filled with hatred and anger. It was just... The way that he put on a show, she supposed.

So she lay down on the bed, put ice in her glass and poured herself some more soda. And did her best to try and pay attention to the movie. Did her best to pretend that she wasn’t completely consumed by whatever had just happened.

It was a kiss. Deal with it. You’re a twenty-nine-year-old woman. And it is hardly the first time you’ve ever kissed him.

But she had trouble. And she had even more trouble sleeping. Landry was awakening needs in her that she just didn’t want him to awaken. It wasn’t fair. She hadn’t asked for this.

But maybe there was a lesson buried in there somewhere. They had Lila. She could hear Lila breathing in the bed next to hers. Deep and steady.

Maybe there were always difficult things mixed in with the good things.

Counterbalances.

She wasn’t entirely sure.

One thing she did know was that her life had all the external trappings of being together. That it hadn’t felt this deep, this resonant in a long time.

She loved her sisters. Loved her family. Her friends.

But this was something more. Something deeper.

And she realized that whatever was happening between her and Landry, she nearly welcomed the struggle. Because at least it felt honest.

Maybe that was actually what this was. Emotional honesty. All the difficult things being dragged to the surface and dealt with.

For them, attraction was part of it. Maybe it always would be. But maybe they could find a place for that too. A way to handle it that wouldn’t break them.

He had listened to her. Even though her body had very much not wanted him to.

It would be so easy to let him sweep her away. To almost demand that he didn’t listen to her when she said things likestop. Because part of her would love to be able to absolve herself of the responsibility of the kind of tangle they might get in. To claim that he had bypassed her objections and made her lose her head.

They were different now. She thought back to the way he had listened.

They were different now. The heat might be the same. But they weren’t.

She fell asleep with that repeating in her head over and over again.

LANDRYCOULDN’TLETgo of the kiss. Which was sort of ridiculous when you were hanging out in the world’s most basic continental breakfast room watching your daughter get free hotel waffles out of one of those weird dispensers where you poured the batter into a Dixie cup and hoped for the best. Fia was across the way at the coffee dispenser, and he was already halfway through his second cup, sitting in front of a plate of bacon and eggs. Which had earned him more commentary on his potential cholesterol from Lila and Fia.

Fia was acting so normal. And he felt anything but. He felt scalded. Scorched. But he wanted to give her exactly what she needed. What she wanted.

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