Page 44 of Emergency Engagement

She moved on him, slowly then a little faster, and then, as she felt their bodies reaching the same point of no return, she flung her arms around his neck and buried her head against his shoulders as the wonder of her orgasm swept her away.

She was as weak as a kitten when finally the pleasure subsided, and she opened her eyes and sat back, still feeling him in her.

‘Rafael,’ she murmured huskily.

‘Jesus, that was amazing.’

‘You mean that?’

‘Of course I do.’ He smiled. ‘The ground moves every time...incredible. If I were ever to be caught up in an actual earthquake, no one would be able to say that I wouldn’t know what it felt like.’

‘It’s the same for me.’

‘Glad to hear it.’ He stroked his fingers through her hair and their eyes tangled in a lengthening silence. Sammy could feel the pulse in her temple beating steadily as she continued to look at him and this time there was no hiding what she was feeling. She’d spent enough time covering up her feelings for this guy. Now was the time for truth or else they would part company and the moment would be lost.

‘Sammy...’

‘You know what I want to say, don’t you?’ she murmured gruffly.

‘No, I don’t. Don’t say it, Sammy.’

‘I’m in love with you, Rafael.’

‘You’re not.’

He fidgeted and she eased off him to stand back, valiantly looking at him, proud of her nudity and wanting him to see the woman who wanted to live her life uninhibited with the man she loved.

He didn’t meet her eyes and she swallowed and slowly put the dress back on. Her body was still hot and sticky from love-making, although somewhere inside her something was shutting down. But she wasn’t going to give this up without a fight.

‘Don’t tell me what I am, Rafael.’

‘This wasn’t part of the plan.’

‘Plans don’t always work out the way you think they’re going to. I didn’t even like you when I first met you, and I fooled myself for ages that you weren’t the sort of guy for me, even though I was attracted to you.’

‘I need to get dressed.’

Sammy looked away, for the first time feeling the space between them and holding on to her pride with difficulty, but determined to speak her mind and to heck with it.

When she next looked at him, they were no longer lovers but uncertain strangers staring across a divide. At least that was what it felt like to her. She saw the way he had shut down. His expression was shuttered and defensive.

‘Rafael, I know how you feel about love and commitment and marriage and all that stuff...’

‘I honestly don’t know where you’re going with this, and it’s not something I want to talk about.’

‘You’re afraid of involvement and afraid of being open to your emotions. But look at us for the past few weeks, Rafael: we’ve been brilliant together. We’ve shared things, we’ve talked...andI meanreallytalked. You don’t want to admit it but you’re like me. I didn’t want to fall in love with you because you didn’t make any sense for me and my life, but I did. Sometimes you just can’t help what happens to your heart. Maybe it was the same for you.’

Sammy looked at him hopelessly. She breathed in deeply but already her mind was running ahead, predicting the inevitable outcome. She would have to leave. She was speaking her mind and everything she was saying was falling on barren ground because the signs hadn’t been there—not for him. It really had just been a physical attraction for him and, even if it hadn’t, even if he felt something for her, his beliefs were too ingrained for him ever to change them.

Mentally, she was packing her suitcase. The soft sounds of insects, the warm, still tropical air, the darkness of the pool and the optimistically laid out table now seemed horribly mocking, so she tried not to look at any of it but to keep her eyes firmly focused on the man gazing at her with cool, unreadable eyes.

‘I’m sorry to disappoint you, Sammy, but no. It wasn’t the same for me. I am not a man who’s in search of love. I never have been and I never will be. I thought we were on the same page. If I’d had the slightest idea that you might begin thinking that this charade we’ve been playing was the real thing, then there’s no way I would ever have involved you in it in the first place.’

‘No,’ she agreed dully.

‘I like you, Sammy.’ His voice gentled. ‘But liking isn’t loving. Liking is enjoying someone’s company.’

‘Okay.’ She looked up at him. He was being kind and she couldn’t stand it. ‘I think I’m going to pack and get back home.’

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