Page 40 of Drowning

twenty-two

Feeling Alive

E m e r s o n

Walking down the desolate beach, barefoot in only a t-shirt long enough to cover my ass, I welcome the rain as it drenches me, making me feel alive.

Somewhat alive.

With a blunt in one hand and a bottle in the other, I dig my toes into the sand with each step, trying to breathe through the overwhelming stress that's seeped into my bones. I take a hit, then a swig, trying to numb the parts of me that hurt, not wanting to feel anything anymore.

I thought I'd never leave Damon,but I did.

I thought I'd never get over Damon,but I did.

I thought I'd never find anyone I loved as much as him, but I did.

But at what expense? I've come between my brother and his best friend. I've come between my brother and the man he looks up to as a father. I've come between the men in the club and my brother. I've ruined his life all while trying to make mine better. But as much as I've hurt Eli, I can't get those men off my mind, and it makes me a shitty fucking person—a shitty sister to the only family I've got.

I shiver from a ransom chill, not from the rain or the whipping wind, but from the unsettling feeling of someone watching me. Nervously, I turn around, slowly looking everywhere I can, but I don't see anyone. Immediately, my mind goes to Damon, and suddenly everything else doesn't seem as bad as it did.

My heart is racing as I continue to walk along the beach, the rain pouring down around me. I can't shake the feeling that Damon is still out there, somewhere, watching me. But for now, all I can do is keep walking, hoping that the rain will wash away some of the pain and confusion inside of me.

Approaching the lit-up part of the beach from the stream of light from our backyard, I see a dark figure standing in the distance, and alarm bells start going off inside my head. I swallow slowly, taking another hit and another sip, forcing my feet to keep moving. But as I move, the figure doesn't, leaving me confused. Is it Damon? Wouldn't he have chased me down by now? I wonder, but the fact that he likes to watch and torment me from afar makes me think it isn't him, and a wave of relief washes over me.

Getting closer and closer, I let out the breath I've been holding when the light illuminates Seven's bruised, bloody face, thankful that it isn't Damon. I run the rest of the way to him, jumping into his arms and knocking him down onto the sand. I bury my face in the crook of his neck, letting my tears soak into his skinas he protectively wraps his arms around me, holding me firmly on top of him.

"What are you doing out here all alone, Princess?" he asks, sounding worried but relieved at the same time.

"I needed to think," I admit, finally drawing back to look at him and running my fingers gently over the marks on his face. "Eli?"

"Yeah, we got into it at the bar once I told him how I felt about you, like how I really fucking felt." Seven smiles, his split lip leaking blood as the scab breaks.

I sit up straight on him, my hands on his stomach, while he reaches around and holds my ass, his touch giving me goosebumps.

"And how do you really feel?" I ask nervously, my voice strained and soft.

"I fucking love you, Emerson," he admits, his teary eyes glistening under the glow of the light. "I've loved you forsofucking long, and I'm tired of trying to fight it."

I feel a mixture of emotions overwhelm me—shock, fear, and a glimmer of hope all at once. "Seven, I... I don't know what to say," I whisper, feeling the weight of his confession.

But before I can process it, he leans in and gently kisses me, his lips soft against mine, tasting of blood and rain.

"I love you," I blurt out, so fast I couldn't take it back if I wanted to. But that's the thing—I don't want to.

Seven smiles, his black, swollen eyes glimmering under the dim light, as they pierce into mine, searching deep within my soul. He cups my cheek, his soft hand holding me protectively as the calloused pad of his thumb glides with ease across my bottom lip, smearing the mixture of our spit around.

"You love me, huh?" He jokes, sinking his teeth into his lip as I rock against him, leaning my cheek against his palm for even more of his touch.

"Yes, I love you, Seven. I know I shouldn't. I know my brother is going to be fucking pissed, but at the same time, I need to do what makes me happy, and loving you is at the top of my fucking list." I dart my tongue out from between my lips and lick his thumb sensually, watching dark lust flash in his eyes.

He smirks, holds my throat tighter, and casually pushes his thumb into my mouth. Instinctively, I seal my lips around it and stroke it with my tongue, feeling his cock jump under my ass as his eyes grow hooded and dark. I suck on it like I would his cock, feeling him thrust further into my mouth, slightly pressing down on my tongue.

“Shit,” he groans, biting his lip again while his eyes do the majority of the talking. "That's my good fucking girl," he sweetly whispers, easing his thumb out of my mouth. And with all the spit soaking it, he smears it all over my lips, looking hungry as fuck...for me.

I shiver from the look he gives me, not knowing how to fucking respond. It's silent, all but the angry, crashing waves, rattling thunder, and pelting rain against our bodies. We entwine on the beach, not moving, enveloped in a fucking beautiful blanket of darkness that wraps tightly around us, giving off a light that's only meant for us.

There's something oddly satisfying of being corrupted by darkness, like it's where we were meant to be, meant to prevail. I'd rather delve into the darkness with Seven, than be trapped in the light all alone.

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