Page 52 of Breaking Boston

The cold air around me clears my head a little, and I take a deep breath in, feeling the tension slowly release from my body. I take another drag of my cigarette and watch the smoke swirl into the air, feeling a sense of calm wash over me for the first time in days. As I stand there, gazing out at the city, I hear the door inside the apartment close. I don't have to turn around to know both guys are watching me; I can feel their gaze burning holes into my back.

"I want to go to the Taylor's house tonight." I breathe in the cold air, feeling the burn in my chest.

"So soon? The cops are out heavy right now since they discovered Remy's body." Donovan steps closer, placing his hand on the small of my back.

"I want it done so I can move on. I'm ready to get my life back."

A silence falls around us and an uncomfortable feeling finds its way into my stomach, making me feel off. I can't explain it. Lux comes to the other side of me, kissing my cold cheek, my eyes still stuck on the piles of snow below.

"Is there something you're not telling me?" My heart thumps wildly, sounding like there's a bass drum inside my chest.

They remain quiet, confirming my suspicions, but I don't let the betrayal define me. Not yet, anyway. I turn around and brush past them, keeping quiet so I don't blow up. Inside, I sit down and do another shot, followed by a line of coke that they just brought home. The drugs invade my body, making me feel invincible, giving me strength I never knew I had. I know this has to stop, and it will, but not before the Taylors are dealt with. They're the last piece of my puzzle, and until they're dead like Remy, I won't ever have the peace I've been desperately searching for.

They'll pay for what they did. I'll make sure of it.

TWENTY-THREE

THE JOURNAL

BOSTON

My thoughts won't stop wandering back to the note that Donovan had left for me a few days ago. I can't get the writing out of my mind and how it looked so similar to the writing in my parent's journal. Could it be a coincidence that two people have the same exact penmanship? Sure, but I highly doubt that's the case.

I pull out the wrinkled piece of paper and open the journal, comparing the script written on both. As gasp falls from my parted lips as I look them over, noticing that they're the exact same. I flip through the pages, noticing a different writing mixed in and my heart sinks.

Motherfuckers, I mutter, flying off the bed.

Searching through my bag, I pull out a letter that Lux had left for me a long time ago, hoping the writing doesn't match that in the journal...but it does.

The feeling of betrayal has never felt so strong before. Everything inside of me ignites, turning to a wildfire of rage as I throw the book across the room, sitting on the bed with my head in my hands.

They fucking played me. They betrayed me. They wrote the journal and played it off as if it was my parents who wrote it. But how? I had the journal before I showed up at the Taylors'.

Didn't I?

I try to rack my brain for memories, but there are none. Pacing the floor near the open window, darkness begins to take hold over me, sucking me in deeper than I'd ever been before. I didn't think my life could get any darker, but I was wrong.

The betrayal runs even deeper than I imagined. How could they have orchestrated the whole thing? What else have they manipulated or lied to me about? I feel a deep sense of loss and confusion. As I try to gather my thoughts, I realize that I need to confront Lux and Donovan, but I have to be smart about it. The way my emotions are running fucking wild, I don't know if I'll have the patience to be smart about it.

I want fucking answers and I want them now. I'm done being the girl everyone walks all over. It's time for me to walk all over them.

Lux Kingsley and Donovan Hades are beautiful fucking monsters consumed by darkness, temptation, and sin.

They promised to ruin me, to break me. But they can't break what's already broken.

They protected me and then made me believe that I was nothing but a pawn in their wicked game. So I'll play along, determined to win.

They underestimated the strength that lies within me—the determination to find the truth.

The darkness they tried to drown me in will be no match for the darkness I carry within.

I will not be broken any longer.

I sitin the dark in the living room, high out of my mind, my body numb, my anger fuming. Holding the pistol that Lux gave me in my hand, cocked and ready to use, I sat here and waited for Lux and Donovan to arrive home.

I don't have a plan yet, I'm too worked up to think straight, and the drugs certainly don't help. Stil, I do another shot and light a blunt, still trying to grasp the fact that they lied to me about something so... big.

Suddenly, the door opens and they stumble in laughing, flipping the light on. They freeze in their tracks when they see me sitting in the recliner in the dark, realization on their faces. The journal sits on the table beside me, along with the notes, proof of their matching handwriting. I keep the gun in my hand and my finger on the trigger, waiting to see if I'll be able to pull it.

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