Page 36 of Desperately Yours

The scent in the air shifted to a sweet, floral aroma akin to a blossoming meadow in the spring. I narrowed my eyes as I pressed forward. My heart pounded in my chest, my breath shallow, as the surrounding silence grew deafening, leaving me paralyzed with the looming uncertainty of whether I was on the right path. I took the last turn and stared at the wooden wall that blocked my path. I ran my palms over the rough wood, searching for some latch or trigger to release me, but nothing gave way. Had I missed the marker? Was I on the brink of stumbling into the throne room, unwittingly about to commit an irrevocable transgression? My stomach twisted into knots. How did I get myself into situations like this?

The sound of squeaks overhead sent a jolt of adrenaline through my body. Instantly, my brain went to visions of bats tangled in my hair and screams no one would ever hear in this underground tunnel. Afraid the light would wake them more, I flicked the switch on the lantern and held my breath. Anothersqueak sounded, but it was more like a child protesting morning. One more, and then silence. Each breath escaped my lips in hushed whispers, cautious and shallow, as if afraid to betray my presence. When the silence continued, I opened my eyes and stared into the dark.

Stripped of the lantern’s warm radiance, the tunnel sank into impenetrable darkness. The tendrils of panic slithered at the perimeter of my mind, threatening to consume me, but I refused to succumb. Fitz wouldn’t leave me to fail. One of three things had happened.

Either I had lost my way and ended up where I wasn’t supposed to be, or someone had laid a careful trap for me, and had roped Bishop into the ruse.

I sighed. Or… there was a way out, but I couldn’t see it yet. Out of all of them, the last one felt the most unbelievable. “Come on, Fitz,” I whispered. Trying not to make a sound, I turned in place searching the darkness. As I was about to give up, I saw it. A thin sliver of warm light ten feet ahead, a part of the wooden wall. It only spanned three feet across, then three feet down, all at the base of the wall. Like a little… door. It had to be another lantern.

Ironically, I hadn’t been able to see it until I turned my own light off. I hurried toward it, eager to get out of the tunnel before I became claustrophobic. I set my lantern on the ground and then set my palms to the dark center of the illuminated square piece. Without much pressure, the tiny door swung open. On my stomach, I wriggled through, no longer nearly so concerned with my clothes and more worried about getting out again. But the other side of the doorway didn’t have the same cobblestone flooring. Instead, it was… straw.

I pulled myself from the tunnel and then pushed the door shut behind me. If Fitz wanted to go back the way we came, he was going to have to go first. No way was I going through bat alley again by myself again. I shuddered just thinking about it.

The crisp night air cooled my skin. I hadn’t realized how clammy it had become while I was in the passage. I took shallow breaths, knowing the cold would burn if I breathed too deeply. With every step I took, the straw beneath my feet made a faint rustling sound, adding a comforting ambiance to the otherwise desolate stall that had no trace of an owner. Somewhere, a horse snorted as if I’d startled it. Once more, I found myself worried this was all luck, and I’d landed in the royal stables by accident, not by Fitz’s design.

I gripped the latch on the stall gate and pulled it back, watching the rest of the stable with wary attention. The last thing I needed was for guards to pop out and seize me like I was some American horse thief. Gripping the lantern, I ventured into the rest of the stable. Most of the animals were sleeping. Puffs of vapor exploded from their noses as I disrupted their slumber. I apologized and moved on, nervously searching. Exhaling, my breath made a cloud in front of my face. One more step. That was all I would give him. Just one more…

My boot landed on something slick. My mind immediately went to the worst potential scenarios. Everything from a pool of blood, livestock manure, or a slug that I’d crushed underfoot. But when I peeled back my boot and put the light over it, I smiled.

Rose petals.

In all my panic, I’d missed the trail of rose petals on the ground that led to the mouth of the stable. Feeling comforted that I had found the right place, I followed the trail. Each step made my heart that much lighter. I stepped out of the stable and couldn’t help my reaction one bit.

After all, how often does the man of your dreams greet you with two fully saddled and gorgeous horses both bathed in Nolcovian moonlight?

“Thank the stars. I was beginning to worry.” The warmth in his eyes made the excitement in my chest turn nearly nuclear. “Fancy a ride, love?”

Fitz

My own escape from the palace hadn’t been easy, but my date certainly had a tale to spin. I smiled as we rode into the tree line and Michaela told me her tale of woe in the secret passages beneath the palace. To my credit, I’d never seen the bats. Another plan might have been in order if I’d known.

The gentle cadence of the horses made it impossible for her to find fear, even in the frozen land we traversed. The stairs, the escape hatch I’d used more times than I could count as a young lad, even all the creeping things, they felt like another world, another lifetime as we moved away from the palace grounds. Snow crunched under the horses’ hooves. The gentle brush of tree branches against Michaela’s coat rustled in the silence of the night. The deeper we moved into the forest, the darker it became. I’d brought up the same point to Bishop as he helped me hash out my new plan, but he assured me everything would be taken care of.

The full moon’s silvery glow cast enough light to stay on the path. I worried over the chill in the air, but Michaela showed no signs of concern. I urged my black steed forward. We had quite a bit of ground to cover before we arrived where I’d planned. From there… well, we would see where the night took us. My stomach still churned with doubt over the choices I’d made. Walking away from crown and country would not be an easy feat and the repercussions would likely follow me for the rest of my life. But everything depended on her answer and that was still likely hours away. In the meantime, I focused on the moonlit path in front of us. One foot in front of the other, traveling to a new future, one where she would hopefully join me.

Michaela

Maybe he was cold. Maybe that’s why he wasn’t talking. It wasn’t that Fitz was emotionally cold. Nervous, maybe, but he smiled and turned in his saddle to respond when I asked a question. But he didn’t engage in conversation like he normally would.

Granted, we were traveling through the forest that surrounded the palace. The same one, as I understood it, where we had reenacted The Snood. Dagny, before she was sent home, had shown me a map of the expansive Winderlam Forest. The dayof the reenactment, we went to the far northeastern side where the original walls of the previous palace stood. But the new palace had been constructed on the exact opposite corner on the southwestern side.

The way Fitz navigated the trails, I had no doubt that he’d grown up riding this land. I blew out a puff of air. What was it about seeing your breath in the air that was so mesmerizing? I’d been doing it since I was a kid, and yet, I never got tired of it. Maybe it felt a bit magical. The one time I could actually see air, like it was frozen in place by a spell.

That was how the whole forest felt to me after being in Nolcovia for almost a month. It was otherworldly, trapped somewhere between fantasy and reality, and the forest was the barrier that kept the magic at bay. The leather reins slipped between my gloved hands as my horse pulled for more leeway. My horse’s pace quickened as if she knew more than I did and sensed an end. I hoped so. As much as I loved wandering in the wilderness with Fitz, it had to be close to 1 a.m. and the day wore on me. I felt as if we’d been riding for hours, but that was likely just my mind playing tricks.

My horse’s rib cage vibrated beneath my legs as she let out a gentle knicker at Fitz’s horse. Maybe she was as impatient as I was. I leaned forward to pat her graceful neck when the light ahead of me caught my eye. Like a golden beam of sunshine, the forest was illuminated with gentle, twinkling lights. What looked like thousands of tiny lights cascaded from the trees above us, a blanket of starry orbs. I stared as if I couldn’t trust what I was seeing. They wound around the trees, overhead, through the branches, small and large, bright and dull, but more than I could count.

“Fitz…” I couldn’t think of what came after that. What words could ever do it justice? “How did you—when did you—”

“I didn’t.” He turned his horse into the haven of lights and angled in his saddle to glance over his shoulder. “You know this forest is magic.”

I frowned at the way he was keeping a secret from me, but I didn’t harbor a grudge because the lights caught on tiny crystals that hung in the trees. Small rainbows scattered over the snowy ground. Too much longer and I was bound to believe him about all the spirits who lived in these woods.

My horse stopped abruptly, snapping me out of my trance. Like a ride at the fair, she had run into the horse in front of her and cued the end of our time together. Thankfully, Fitz waited on the ground, his reins in his hand. “Come on, then. There’s more.”

I set my reins forward on my horse’s neck and smirked. “More? My, your spirits have been busy, haven’t they?”

“Quite.” He motioned like he planned to help me. “Now hurry, I’m bound to freeze to death without some of your body heat.”

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