Page 69 of By His Side

“Not outright. But enough that it backs up what I’m saying. At least I think it does. I can show them to you.”

“If it backs up what you’re saying, then yes, it’s possible we might have something,” I said, excitement causing the words to clog in my throat. I risked a glance at Felix as he got up and paced again. “You realize you’d have to speak out against your brother?”

She smiled wanly. “He told me I was a bitch the last time I went to see him.”

I chose my words carefully. “Yeah, but… you have to be realistic about this. You can’t do it just because you’re pissed at your brother. If you change your mind, it will do more harm than good. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I need your word that you’re one hundred percent on board with this, because anything less than that would be cruel.”

“I am. He… Julian isn’t getting out. It won’t make any difference to him.” She turned her head to where Felix was still pacing, as agitated as I’d ever seen him. “But it will make a difference to you, right?” When Felix glanced her way without answering, she returned her attention to me. “How would it work, anyway?”

“Erm…” I attempted to sift my churning thoughts into some sort of order and dredge up what I knew about the appeals process. “You submit a form… an NG form to the Criminal Cases Review Commission stating what the fresh evidence is. If they think there are enough grounds that a miscarriage of justice may have taken place, they refer it to the court of appeal, who have the final say whether the conviction stands or is reversed.”

“Let me guess,” Felix said, his pacing finally coming to a halt as he braced his arms against the back of the chair. “It takes years?”

I shook my head. “Not always. The Criminal Cases Review Commission will make their decision within months and if it goes to the court of appeal and they deem it to be relatively straightforward, that can be quick as well. I doubt they’d want such a high-profile case dragging on longer than necessary. And if they reverse the sentence, you’ll be entitled to apply for compensation. That will take longer.”

“I don’t care about money.”

“Maybe not, but you’ll have the right to it.” I waited for Laura to blow her nose again. “You’d have to repeat what you told me, probablymultiple times, and possibly in court under oath. And you’d have to submit the letters as evidence.”

She gave a distinctly shaky nod. “I can do that. I will do that.” She bit her lip. “It won’t make up for what I did seven years ago, but it’s something, at least.”

“It is something.” I reached over to where Felix’s hand was still wrapped around the back of the chair, his knuckles white, and gave it a squeeze. “I have a good feeling about this. You’re going to get your life back.”

Chapter Twenty-seven

Felix

Six months later

I cringed away from the flash of lightbulbs, the pack of reporters outside the court having grown while we’d been inside. They wasted no time in shoving their microphones my way and barking out questions. Questions which overlapped and gave me no time to answer, even if I wanted to. “Mr. Church, how does it feel to have your name cleared after all these years?”

“How do you feel about what’s happened? Are you angry or are you relieved that the truth has finally come out?”

“Will you be applying for compensation? How much do you think will make up for seven years of being wrongly incarcerated?”

“Were you confident the judgment would go your way today?”

“What was your previous relationship like with Ms. Blackwell? Are you grateful she came forward with new evidence? Why did she wait so long?”

“Mr. Church, do you have something you’d like to say to Mr. Blackwell, a message for him? Why do you think he lied?”

Darien kept tight hold of my hand to tug me through the crowd, as much an anchor today as he’d been for the past few months, getting here not seeming worth all the upheaval at times. I was beyond grateful for how supportive he’d been, spearheading everything from start to finish, and putting up with my moods on top of dealing with his own resignation from the probation service when it had become obvious it was only a matter of time before they’d terminate his contract, anyway.

As of today, it had been worth it, my name officially cleared and my criminal record expunged. I was no longer Felix Church, the man who’d been complicit in the murder of a sixteen-year-old girl, and instead, I was Felix Church, the man who’d suffered a terrible miscarriage of justice. Darien leaned in so his words were for me and me alone. “You should make a statement. They won’t stop hounding you until you do.”

Knowing he was right didn’t stop bile from rising in my throat at the mere thought of it. Right now, I would have taken a pack of savage dogs over this lot. Did they think I didn’t know they were the same people who’d driven me from my mother’s house? Therefore, this supportive act, complete with empathetic expressions and words of sympathy, was nothing but bullshit.

“And he’ll see it,” Darien said. “Or someone will tell him about it.”

I stopped dead. Yeah, he would. I hadn’t asked Laura whether there’d been any discussion with her brother about what she was doing. I assumed she’d confessed to him at some point, but honestly,all I cared about was him rotting away in prison. But saying one last fuck you to Julian was tempting. Very tempting.

Darien let go of my hand as I turned toward the nearest TV camera, the appeal process having received almost as much media attention as the murder had. My heart thrummed in my chest as I took a deep breath, wanting my words to be clear and wishing I’d thought of something to say ahead of time. “I’m sure you can imagine how I feel today. Seven years ago, I too was a victim of Julian Blackwell, just like poor Lily Reynolds, who none of us should ever forget. He may not have killed me, but he subjected me to physical and emotional abuse that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. And then he implicated me in the heinous crime that he and he alone committed. Maybe in time he would have killed me, too. I guess we’ll never know. Maybe what happened was the best-case scenario, but you’ll have to excuse me for struggling to see that. Seven years is a very long time to spend inside when you did nothing wrong.”

I tamped down on the surge of emotion rising in my chest, wanting my words to stay calm and matter of fact. “The courts may have cleared me, but I still have a lot of healing to do mentally. With that in mind, I won’t be making any more statements after this one, and I ask to be left alone so I can get on with the rest of my life. I think I’ve earned that.” At least that got a few embarrassed looks. “As for compensation, that’s a conversation I need to have with my lawyer and not something I can currently comment on. Clearing my name was never about the money. It was about being able to live my life without constant whispers following me around. It was about being able to travel. Being able to do something as simple as applying for a job. All things that were taken from me when I went to prison. All I want to concentrate on from this moment forward is being happy.”

“Mr. Church, doyou…?”

I was already walking away. I reached out blindly, warm fingers finding mine, Darien exactly where I needed him to be, just as he’d been ever since we’d met. “Very eloquent,” he said as we headed to the waiting car, my next breath not occurring until we were safely in the back seat with the door closed.