Page 36 of By His Side

When I nodded, he disappeared with another smile, leaving me to ponder Darien seeming far more relaxed today. What was that about? An easier day at work? Or the after effects of good sex?

When he reappeared, his hair was damp like he’d taken a quick shower, and worn gray sweatpants and a plain white T-shirt had taken the place of the suit. He didn’t have any shoes on, something about his bare toes making me smile.

“What?” he asked, looking at me strangely.

I set about dishing up the food while he sat. “I don’t think I’m meant to see my PO’s bare feet.”

“You’ve seen a lot more of me than just my feet.” His eyebrows rose as I set the plate in front of him. “Jesus! This looks good.”

I shrugged, trying not to smile at the praise and failing miserably as I added garlic bread and a bowl of salad to the offering on the table. Having retrieved my plate, I sat opposite. Despite how complimentary he’d already been, nerves were still present as he took his first taste.

His wide smile showed his dimples off to best effect. “Yeah, you’re hired.”

A feeling of lightness spread through me. “As what?”

Darien tipped his head to one side and pretended to think about it. “Personal chef.”

“Not a bed warmer?”

He scooped salad onto his plate, his gaze when it lifted to mine steady and containing a surprising amount of warmth. Enough warmth that I almost turned to see if someone else had come into the kitchen while I wasn’t looking to stand behind me. “That, as well. Have you got any more hidden talents?”

I shook my head, finally getting round to tasting the food myself. I had to admit that it was pretty damn good. Julian would have found fault with it had I served it to him, but then Julian had found fault with everything once the honeymoon period of our relationship had been over. Food was too raw or overcooked. Under-seasoned or over-seasoned. Or there were things he claimed to have told me he didn’t eat anymore when he’d said no such thing. He’d even invented an allergy once and accused me of trying to kill him. There’d been no winning with him.

Darien propped his chin on his hand and studied me. “What did you do before? As a job, I mean? I don’t remember from your file.”

“Software engineer.” The words felt strange, like that had been a lifetime ago, and I was talking about someone else.

“Huh! So you do have another talent.”

I shrugged and concentrated on my food.

“Do you want to get back into that?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t thought about it.” There was no lie there. I hadn’t thought about anything apart from getting out of prison, and now that day had come, the thought of a full-time job just made mefeel tired. Especially one in an office. I had an inkling it would feel too much like a cell.

“Did you enjoy it?”

I took a long swallow of wine while I considered the question. “I don’t remember. It was a long time ago. Does it matter? No one’s going to hire me, anyway? Not when they find out who I am.” I pointed my fork at Darien. “And don’t tell me to change my name again, because you know as well as I do that there are no jobs that don’t do identity checks as part of their appointment proceedings.”

“You could move out of London.”

“To where? Outer Mongolia? I’m on parole in case you’ve forgotten, and nowhere that needs a visa is going to give me one with my criminal record.”

A strained silence fell over the table, both of us eating without looking at the other.

Eventually, Darien let out a sigh. “I’m sorry. I should have left the job at the office.”

He made it sound like we were living together. “I’m only here because of the job. I get you want me employed and with somewhere to live so that I’m out of your hair.”

“It’s not like that.”

“No?”

“No. I was just trying to make conversation, to find out more about you. Not as your PO, but as a…”

“As a what?” It was unfair to push him when he didn’t finish the sentence, but I had a reputation as a prize asshole to live up to, and I was apparently determined to do just that. “My temporary landlord? My rescuer? A friend? A lover?”

Darien, to give him his due, just kept eating with no sign that my mini tirade had affected him at all. And he had more sense than toanswer the question. Because we both knew there was no right answer, that I’d never wanted one, my words intended solely as provocation.

---