Page 37 of For the Rest of Forever

Allen stopped right at the threshold to the kitchen, and when Greg stopped with him, turning slightly so he could see his husband, Allen swallowed tightly and lowered his eyes. Their hands were still joined, but Greg could almost feel Allen pulling away from him.

“You’re... not going to try and talk me out of going to work today, right? Even if I... even if I can’t really eat much?” The serious question was tempered a bit when a small half-smile grew on Allen’s lips and he said in a light tone, “Please say no.”

Greg chuckled quietly as he shook his head. “No. I won’t try to stop you today. But I think we should talk before we have to leave because Iamworried.”

Allen’s gray-blue eyes softened, and he nodded. “I know. I’m sorry—or, I mean—” He screwed his eyes shut for a second and blew out a short breath. “I mean, I understand that you’re worried, and I’ve already thought about it a lot this morning because I—because it was more difficult than I thought it was going to be when you were gone and I was alone. I actually, um...”

Greg felt some deep shiver run through him at Allen’s words, and he stepped in front of his husband again and wrapped Allen up in his arms, pulling Allen up against him and kissing the top of his head. Allen seemed to melt into him, returning the embrace.

It felt like this had been their life for the last three days. Incomplete sentences that trailed off into a silence filled by long hugs.

He let his hand rub a familiar path up and down Allen’s back, and he closed his eyes. “Sorry I was gone. I’d have stayed if I’d known,” he said, suddenly feeling almost breathless.

“I know,” Allen said quietly. “And I didn’t think it was going to be so hard. But I... I knew you wouldn’t be too long, and I could call Joe if I needed to. And Beans was here. The little stinker crawled up on the bed andunder the coversthis time. Give him an inch and he’ll take a mile.”

Greg gently backed up a step and then lifted a hand to cup Allen’s cheek. There was an attempt at a small smile on Allen’s lips, but his eyes were almost stormy. Greg bent down to kiss him, softly, lightly, and when they parted, he shook his head slightly. “He is a stinker.”

“I’ll try to eat some toast, if you still want to make it for me,” Allen said, and he reached up to kiss Greg again. It was another soft kiss, but Allen deepened it just a little and let it linger just a little more.

A few minutes later, they both sat at the table to eat—Allen’s slice of sourdough toasted but plain and Greg’s toasted and topped with an avocado spread, turkey bacon, and chopped tomatoes.Allen scooted his chair close to Greg’s, and they worked on the weekly crossword puzzle in the newspaper for a bit. There were occasional laughs at some of the odder clues, and for a few minutes, Greg’s head and heart seemed able to forget all the strife and uncertainty and justbewith his husband.

When they’d both finished eating, Greg picked up their plates and moved them to the sink. “I’ll take care of everything later. You’re supposed to be at work by nine? We should leave, eh?” he said, setting the dishes down and turning back around to face Allen.

“Um, yeah, I... That’s what I wanted to talk about actually. Are you...” Allen paused for a second, closed his eyes, and took a deep breath. “Are you, um, busy right now? This morning?”

Greg sat back against the counter a bit and shook his head, though Allen wasn’t watching him. “I’m not busy, darling. I’m whatever you need.”

That elicited a small laugh, and Allen finally opened his eyes again and looked back up at Greg. “Whatever I need, huh?”

“Yup,” Greg replied. “Husband, chef, escort—to walk you to work, I mean.” He pushed away from the counter and made his way back to the table just as Allen started to stand up, chuckling and shaking his head.

“Well, then, my husband and master executive chef, will youescortme to work? And...” Allen pursed his lips and frowned, but then seemed to find his resolve. “And then will you stay with me for a bit? Annabeth isn’t going to be in until ten thirty, just before the preschool group is supposed to arrive, and I, um, don’t want to be there alone. And it sort of... really hurts to even admit that, but I’m trying to be more honest with myself too, and that’s... that’s the real truth,” Allen finished, his voice low and shaking with the last few words.

“I understand,” Greg said softly. He pressed his lips to Allen’s forehead in another light kiss. “I’ll stay there with you as long as you need me to. Just let me wash up and change. Give me five minutes?”

After Allen nodded, Greg kissed him one more time and then headed quickly up the stairs to get changed and wash his hands. A few minutes later, he and Allen walked side by side down the street toward town, their hands clasped tightly together. The morning air was still a little crisp, even though the sun shone brightly in the sky, not a cloud in sight, and Greg was happy to have opted for a long-sleeve tech shirt rather than something with short sleeves.

As they rounded the corner, Allen finally broke the silence with a sharp laugh. “Ha! Proverb! How clever!”

Greg just lifted his eyebrows. “Proverb?”

“Number five across. ‘Dog wearing lead.’ The answer is proverb,” Allen declared, a hint of amusement still in his voice.

“I’m . . . not following.”

“I know.”

“Care to explain it to me, darling?”

Allen tilted his head sideways as though considering but then shook his head. “Hmm, nah. You’ll figure it out.”

“Allen!”

Allen laughed again, this time deeper and heartier than before, and when Greg glanced at him, his heart lifted a little at the twinkle in Allen’s eyes. “You’ll figure it out, dear. It’s not too difficult, even for an old geezer like you,” Allen teased.

“An old geezer like me, huh?”

“Mm-hmm. Ancient.”

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