Page 52 of Imperfectly Perfect

Savannah hummed again. This time though, it reeked of sad agreement. Who knew they could have an entire conversation with Savannah hardly speaking. All their conversations so far had been alive with a back and forth. Fallon dropped a kiss onto the top of Savannah’s head, nuzzling her nose into Savannah’s hair.

“Was it just the meeting with Athena?” Fallon asked, her voice as quiet as she could make it.

“No, that was just the tipping point.” Savannah watched Brinley, not the television.

Fallon was hyperaware of that, because she was doing the same. She didn’t want to overstep the boundaries that Savannah had put into place.

“I miss him.”

This was going to be Savannah’s refrain for a while, Fallon knew that. The words tugged at her heart hard because she felt the exact same way about her mom. She dipped her hand upSavannah’s thigh, higher than before, and slid it between her legs.

“I often wonder what life would have been like if my mom had raised us, if she’d left and started fresh. Would it have been easier or harder? Would have I been more scared or less? Would I be the lawyer or still the office manager?” Fallon squeezed Savannah’s thigh. “It’s impossible to know, and I have those questions that run through my mind all the time. But it doesn’t make the missing any easier. Sometimes I think it makes it harder.”

Savannah nodded. “I worry that Brin won’t have a male role model, someone who can show her just what a good guy should look like.”

That statement said way more than the words. Forrest wasn’t that man. Savannah had been clear about that. He wasn’t someone who would be a stand-up, good guy, someone that Savannah or Brinley could rely on.

“I thought Conrad would be that for her.”

“From what you’ve shared about him, he probably was.”

“Come here.” Savannah stood up, leaving her drink on the side table. She took Fallon by the hand into the kitchen where she crossed her arms and leaned against the counter. She glanced down at her toes before looking up at Fallon again.

Fallon’s stomach twisted hard. She wasn’t sure why, but it felt like this was a pivotal moment for them, one that was going to define everything going forward. She held her breath, wishing Savannah would just get to the point already or end this tension in the swiftest way possible.

“I’m thinking about going back to court.”

“For Conrad?”

Savannah shook her head. “For Brinley. Forrest’s been…” Savannah glanced toward the kitchen doorway. “He’s been getting worse, like he did right before I left the last time.”

Fallon’s ears perked up at that. Savannah hadn’t ever explained why the divorce had happened. Not really in full yet, anyway. And she wouldn’t lie and say that it hadn’t piqued her curiosity. What had been the final straw to break the proverbial camel’s back?

“He was violently angry.” Savannah nearly whispered the words. “He never hit me, I want to make that clear, but I wasn’t sure that it wouldn’t ever come to that. My goal was to get out as quickly and easily as I could.”

“And Brinley?”

Savannah shook her head. “He never seemed to focus on her.”

Fallon’s stomach twisted hard. She hadn’t been the focus either when she was really little. But as she’d grown older, as she’d started to push back and have more of an attitude about the disaster that was her home, her father had set her in his sights. “Is he now?”

“I don’t know. Brinley doesn’t talk about staying with him very much, and I try not to push her to tell me either. I don’t want it to seem like I’m prying.”

“But you have to know for a court case.”

“I understand.” Savannah sighed heavily. “I don’t know if I’m going to, not yet. I just know that I don’t want her to live through what I lived through.”

Fallon’s sentiments were very much the same. Her heart stuttered with just the thought. She tried to pull herself back into reality, to keep her mind from straying too far into the past, and the task seemed monumental. Fallon clenched her fist when the timer on the stove went off.

“Breaking the cycle of abuse is difficult,” Fallon said as she stepped toward the stove. She checked the rice first and then poured the rest of the sauce onto the fish. The smell nearly overwhelmed her, but it was glorious and comforting.

“Cycle?” Savannah asked. “I wouldn’t call myself a victim of abuse.”

Could have fooled Fallon. The signs were there whether Savannah wanted to believe them or not. Grasping at straws to try and make Savannah understand, Fallon added, “What would Conrad have thought of it all? If he knew every single thing that’s gone on.”

Savannah tensed. Fallon hated that she’d asked the question at all. It was putting them into an awkward situation, one where they were far more than simple friends with benefits. And Fallon didn’t want to fall back into the protector role that she had worked so damn hard to get out of.

“He’d be appalled. He was anyway. Conrad was never a huge fan of Forrest.”

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