Page 11 of The Girl Who Should Be Dead

“Okay,” he murmurs, then disappears down the hallway, quickly returning, and tosses her the protein bar she had left on the counter. “Eat this.”

She breaks her gaze on the closet to stare at the bar, half numb despite the growing pit of chemicals filtering through the body’s blood. “What?”

“You were shaking like a leaf and staring at some clothing,” he says, voice perfectly serious. “I don’t know why, I don’t know what the College told you, but if you’re in a human body, you have to actually eat food.”

She pokes at the foil package, and it’s a bit easier to look at than the clothing. “I was just having some emotions, I think.”

His brows draw together and he tilts his head, like he’s calculating something, and that is just enough action to break through all the nonsense adrenaline flooding through her.

“I don’t know what you know of demons,” she says, as loftily as she can. Which isn’t much, when her voice still quakes. “But we experience things very differently than humans.”

“So I’ve read,” he replies dryly.

“And some parts of that haven’t translated very well to having actual nerve endings.” She swallows down the lump, risking another glance towards the closet.

It’s still the beautiful kaleidoscope of colors. All lovingly put into place by the body.

“Okay, logical,” Gurlien says, interrupting another surge of sensations. “Probably disorienting, definitely an explanation for some of your twitchiness. Eat the bar.”

She squints at him.

“If they try to bring you back right now, are you in fighting shape?”

The answer to that is a resounding no.

“If they pull you back now, and I get pulled into it, they’ll probably kill me.” His words are clinical, like he’s stating a conclusion he already came to. “They kicked me out, definitely, over a year ago, and I just helped a high value prisoner escape. They’re not going to be merciful to me.”

It’s probably true, and she nods. It’s a good thing for him to keep in mind.

“I don’t particularly want to die,” he says, which again, makes sense. “So my best ticket to surviving the next few days is, until I convince you to undo whatever this is—” he gestures with his wrist, “—is to keep you alive and able to resist. So eat the food.”

“Did your Axel give you that conclusion?” she asks, and his face twitches, like he’s a bit unhappy with her figuring it out that quickly. “Is he a demonology expert?”

Gurlien opens his mouth, then closes it, obviously thinking better of his answer.

She waits, letting her eyes stray back to the closet.

“He’s about as close to an expert as you can get to the Terese project who wasn’t…actively involved in breaking the people,” he says, guarded, and that catches her attention again. “So yes, he gave me a list of things to do, and unless we have a bad reaction to it, I plan on following his tips.”

“I don’t like the experts I’ve met,” she mutters darkly, but picks up the bar, inspecting it.

It’s one of the ones that came in a variety pack, not one of the flavors she tried with the body. Buzz words like ‘protein’ and ‘muscle’ are all over it in bright font, and the body had eaten a few of them when she had described herself as ‘peckish.’

“Don’t worry, he doesn’t either,” Gurlien says, heavily. “He’s also kept his knowledge very quiet. He laughed,”Gurlien says, suddenly, full of frustration. “He laughed when I told him what happened. He laughed at me for this.”

She raises an eyebrow at him.

“I was literally kidnapped, and he laughed out loud.”

“That doesn’t sound like a great friend,” Ambra ventures, peeling open the foil around the bar. It doesn’t smell appealing, but the body’s sense of smell has puzzled her since the beginning.

“Wouldn’t call him a friend.” Gurlien leans against the door jamb, watching her actions like a hawk. “If you don’t like that, there’s a cabinet full of food to pick from, but even if you don’t think you need to, you should eat.”

“Anyone ever tell you you’re pushy?” Despite the casual words, Ambra glances back at the closet.

It’s still so empty without the body with her, even while full to the brim.

And she has to exist like this, now. With evidence of the body existing all over the place, when she’s left alone.

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